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The graph below shows the total revenue of the three pizza places in Vietnam. The figures were taken in 2017

The graph below shows the total revenue of the three pizza places in Vietnam. The figures were taken in 2017 D2jdW
The graph presents the total income of three pizza places in Vietnam in 2017 in US dollar. The total revenue of the Domino Pizza and Pizza Company have dramatical fluctuation but the Pizza Hut has a slightly decrease in total income. In January the Domino pizza and pizza company both have the income about 33 to 34 millions $, Pizza Hut has the lowest one with 14 millions$. Then in February, there is a huge decrease in total income for the Domino and pizza company, about 20 million$ ( from 34 millions to 14 millions for Domino and 31 millions to 11 millions for the pizza company). From February to November, there are some noticeable fluctuation but bot of Pizza Company and Domino total revenue have tend to increase. For the last 3 months, total income of Domino and pizza Company have an increase to 35 millions. To the Pizza hut, from Mar to jun, there is a slightly increase but then dramatically decrease. In conlusion, bot Domino and Pizza Company total income have tend to increase about 1 million dollars from January to December. Pizza hut’s total income slightly decrease 10 millions dollar.
The graph presents the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
total
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
income
of three pizza places in Vietnam in 2017 in US dollar. The
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
total
revenue of the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
Domino
Pizza and Pizza
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
Company
have
Possible spelling mistake found.
dramatical
fluctuation
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
but
the Pizza
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
Hut
has a
You used an adverb ('slightly') instead of an adjective, or a noun ('decrease') instead of another adjective.
slightly decrease
in
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
total
income.

In January the
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Domino
pizza and pizza
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
company
both have the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
income
about 33 to 34
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
millions
$, Pizza
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
Hut
has the lowest one with 14
Possible spelling mistake found.
millions$
. Then in February, there is a huge decrease in
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
total
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
income
for the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
Domino
and pizza
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
company
, about 20
Possible spelling mistake found.
million$
Don't put a space after the opening parenthesis
(
from 34
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millions
to 14
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millions
for
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Domino
and 31
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millions
to 11
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millions
for the pizza
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
company)
. From February to November, there are
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
noticeable fluctuation
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
but
Possible agreement error. Did you mean "bots"?
bot
of Pizza
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Company
and
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
Domino
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
total
revenue have
Use past participle here: "tended".
tend
to
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increase
. For the last 3 months,
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total
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
income
of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
Domino
and pizza
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Company
have an
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
increase
to 35
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millions
. To the Pizza
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hut
, from Mar to jun, there is a
slightly
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increase
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
but
then
dramatically
decrease.

In
Possible spelling mistake found.
conlusion
, bot
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Domino
and Pizza
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
Company
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
total
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
income
have
Use past participle here: "tended".
tend
to
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
increase
about 1
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
million
dollars from January to December. Pizza
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
hut’s
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
total
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
income
slightly
decrease 10
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
millions
dollar.
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IELTS academic The graph below shows the total revenue of the three pizza places in Vietnam. The figures were taken in 2017

Academic
  American English
3 paragraphs
194 words
5.5
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 6.5
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
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    Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.0
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  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.0
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 5.0
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    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
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    Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
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