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The graph below shows the percentage of people who travelled by bus in the UK from 2009 to 2011. Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features and make comparisons where relevant

The graph below shows the percentage of people who travelled by bus in the UK from 2009 to 2011. k3yn
The rendered bar chart illustrates the proportion of people who used the bus for travelling for various purposes in the britain between 2009 and 2011. From the overall analysis, it is manifest that the most preferred mode for going shopping, while the least preferred mode for going to work. At the fleeting glance, it is immensely clear that shopping accounted for 65% and 56% of the number of people used bus in the first two years respectively, subsequent to which the percentage further fell down to 51% in the 2011. In contrast, the figure for work for the year 2009, 2010, 2011 were recorded to be merely 5%, 2%, 0%, which happened to be the least. Probing further, using bus for study purpose stood at 4% in 2009 as against 9% in the following two years. As regards visiting friends, stagnating to just under a fifth(19%) from 2009 to 2010, the percentage of masses rose by 4% in the last year. In 2009, 7% people used bus for day tour, after that this number remained stable in the given two years.
The rendered bar chart illustrates the proportion of
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
people
who
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
used
the bus for travelling for various purposes in the
Possible spelling mistake found.
britain
between 2009 and 2011.

From the
overall
analysis, it is manifest that the most preferred mode for going shopping, while the least preferred mode for going to work.

At the fleeting glance, it is
immensely
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
clear
that shopping accounted for 65% and 56% of the number of
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
people
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
used
bus in the
first
two years
respectively
,
Consider using "after"
subsequent to
which the percentage
further
fell down to 51% in the 2011.
In contrast
, the figure for work for the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
year
2009, 2010, 2011
were recorded
to be
merely
5%, 2%, 0%, which happened to be the least.

Probing
further
, using bus for study purpose stood at 4% in 2009 as against 9% in the following two years. As regards visiting friends, stagnating to
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
just
under a fifth(19%) from 2009 to 2010, the percentage of masses rose by 4% in the last
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
year
. In 2009, 7%
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
people
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
used
bus for day tour, after that this number remained stable in the
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
given
two years.

IELTS academic The graph below shows the percentage of people who travelled by bus in the UK from 2009 to 2011.

Academic
  American English
4 paragraphs
181 words
6.0
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 7.0
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
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    Include an introduction and conclusion
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    Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
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    Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 6.0
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.5
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 5.5
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • ?
    Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
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