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The graph below shows how elderly people in the United States spent their free time between 1980 and 2010.

The graph below shows how elderly people in the United States spent their free time between 1980 and 2010. GkWm
The line graph illustrates information about the different types of activities preferred by elderly people in their leisure time in the united states between 1980 and 2010. The given data is noted in the percentage Overall, watching Tv was the most favorite activity. However, hiking reported the highest follower in the 2010s. In the 1980s, the internet was the least preferable with only 5% of users. However, this rose gradually by the end of the 2000s, and hit its peak point in 2010s, at 50%, which is almost 10 times more than the beginning of the period. Hiking was liked by 20% of people to do as an activity during their free time, in the 1980s, but, the figure of it showed a rise in its users and reach from 20% to 80% bt the end of the period. For reading and theatre, both the activities observed opposite trend, as a result, reading outraced theatre in the 199os before falling to 20% in the 2000s, and again escalated by 40%in 2010. Watching tv was preferred by almost 60% of people, which increase slightly by 10% in 2000, and accounted for 65% at the end of the period.
The line graph illustrates information about the
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different
types of
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activities
preferred by elderly
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
people
in their leisure time in the
The proper noun "United States" needs to be capitalized.
united states
between 1980 and 2010. The
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
given
data
is noted
in the
Please add a punctuation mark at the end of paragraph
percentage


Overall
, watching
Possible spelling mistake found.
Tv
was the most favorite
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activity
.
However
, hiking reported the highest follower in the 2010s.

In the 1980s, the internet was the least preferable with
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
only
5% of users.
However
, this rose
gradually
by the
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
end
of the 2000s, and hit its peak point
The article is probably missing here: "in the 2010s".
in 2010s
, at 50%, which is almost 10 times more than the beginning of the period. Hiking
was liked
by 20% of
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
people
to do as an
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
activity
during their free time, in the 1980s,
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but
, the figure of it
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showed
a rise in its users and reach from 20% to 80%
Possible spelling mistake found.
bt
the
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
end
of the period.

For reading and
Possible spelling mistake. 'theatre' is British English.
theatre
, both the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
activities
observed opposite trend,
as a result
, reading outraced
Possible spelling mistake. 'theatre' is British English.
theatre
in the 199os
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
before
falling to 20% in the 2000s, and again escalated by 40%in 2010. Watching
Possible spelling mistake found.
tv
was preferred
by almost 60% of
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
people
, which increase
slightly
by 10% in 2000, and accounted for 65% at the
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
end
of the period.
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IELTS academic The graph below shows how elderly people in the United States spent their free time between 1980 and 2010.

Academic
  American English
4 paragraphs
197 words
6.0
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 7.0
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
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    One main idea per paragraph
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    Include an introduction and conclusion
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    Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
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    Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.5
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.5
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 5.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
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    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
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    Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
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