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The graph below show category of citrus fruits and top three counties which it exported (thousand tonnes ) in 2012

The graph below show category of citrus fruits and top three counties which it exported (thousand tonnes ) in 2012 GNYLx
The given column charts depict the data about four types of citrus fruits that were exported by different countries in the year 2012. Overall, from the bar graph, it is clear that the USA contributed for all kind of fruits, while Mexico accounted for the highest proportion for lemon and other fruits. To begin with oranges, south africa was made up the highest that was around 100 thousand tonnes, being higer than Egypt contribution (500 thousand tonnes). The United State was not far away from this figure with approximately 490 thousand toones. In contrast, Turkey was dominant county for the export of grapes. Interestingly, Mexico was higher as compared to the USA that was 300 and 200 thousand tonnes respectively. With regard to lemons, Mexico made up the highest numbers (nearby 500 thousand tonnes ). The figure showed same pattern for other fruits in Mexico. However, 200 thousand tonnes lemons were exported by the United state, while Argentina at the lowest point. Whereas, Egypt and the USA accounted for the least for other fruits export.
The
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
given
column charts depict the data about four types of citrus
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
fruits
that
were exported
by
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
different
countries in the year 2012.

Overall
, from the bar graph, it is
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
clear
that the USA contributed for all kind of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
fruits
, while Mexico accounted for the highest proportion for lemon and other fruits.

To
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
begin
with oranges,
If the term is a proper noun, use initial capitals.
south africa
was made
up the highest that was around 100 thousand tonnes, being
Possible spelling mistake found.
higer
than Egypt contribution (500 thousand tonnes). The United State was not far away from this figure with approximately 490 thousand
Possible spelling mistake found.
toones
.
In contrast
, Turkey was dominant county for the export of grapes.
Interestingly
, Mexico was higher
Comparison requires "than", not 'then' nor 'as'.
as
compared to the USA that was 300 and 200 thousand tonnes
respectively
.

With regard to lemons, Mexico made up the highest numbers (nearby 500 thousand tonnes
Don't put a space before the closing parenthesis
)
. The figure
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
showed
same pattern for other
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
fruits
in Mexico.
However
, 200 thousand tonnes lemons
were exported
by the United state, while Argentina at the lowest point. Whereas, Egypt and the USA accounted for the least for other
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
fruits
export.
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IELTS academic The graph below show category of citrus fruits and top three counties which it exported (thousand tonnes ) in 2012

Academic
  American English
4 paragraphs
175 words
6.0
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 7.0
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    Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.5
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  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.5
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  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 5.0
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    Present relevant ideas
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