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The given pie chart witnesses the percentage of residents living in Australia made up of various nationalities. While the table shows the proportion of people living in 2 areas.

The given pie chart witnesses the percentage of residents living in Australia made up of various nationalities. While the table shows the proportion of people living in 2 areas. Wn0ON
The given pie chart witnesses the percentage of residents living in Australia made up of various nationalities. While the table shows the proportion of people living in 2 areas. The initial impression from the chart is that Australians took up the majority of people settled in Australia. It is also clear that all nationalities living in Australia prefer to live in the city rather than the outskirts. Looking at the details, three-quarters of people living in Australia are Australian, which means it has the highest proportion compared to all other counterparts. An opposite pattern is evident in the remaining groups, and those only took up just above a quarter. The figure for Chinese dwellers, in the meantime, is on the bottom of the list, at 1%, making it nowhere as popular as the New Zealander. As can be seen from the table, the percentage of Chinese residents living in the city is 99%, while the figure for New Zealanders is slightly less popular at 90%.
The
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
given
pie chart witnesses the percentage of residents
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
living
in Australia made up of various nationalities.
“While” at the beginning of a sentence usually requires a 2nd clause. Maybe a comma, question or exclamation mark is missing, or the sentence is incomplete and should be joined with the following sentence.
While
the table
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
shows
the proportion of
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
people
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
living
in 2 areas.

The initial impression from the chart is that Australians took up the majority of
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
people
settled in Australia. It is
also
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
clear
that all nationalities
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
living
in Australia prefer to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
live
in the city
rather
than the outskirts.

Looking at the
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
details
, three-quarters of
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
people
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
living
in Australia are Australian, which means it has the highest proportion compared to all other counterparts. An opposite pattern is evident in the remaining groups, and those
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
only
took up
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
just
above a quarter. The figure for Chinese dwellers, in the meantime, is on the bottom of the list, at 1%, making it nowhere as popular as the New
Possible spelling mistake found.
Zealander
.

As can be
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
seen
from the table, the percentage of Chinese residents
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
living
in the city is 99%, while the figure for New Zealanders is
slightly
less popular at 90%.
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IELTS academic The given pie chart witnesses the percentage of residents living in Australia made up of various nationalities. While the table shows the proportion of people living in 2 areas.

Academic
  American English
4 paragraphs
165 words
6.5
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 7.0
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • ?
    Include an introduction and conclusion
  • ?
    Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • ?
    Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 6.0
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.5
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 5.5
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • ?
    Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
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  • The given pie chart witnesses the percentage of residents living in Australia made up of various nationalities. While the table shows the proportion of people living in 2 areas.