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Problems people have when they come to another nation.

Problems people have when they come to another nation. rGQMp
The chart shows information about the problems people have when they come to another nation. Overall, there are three difficulties with different levels in three groups of people aged from 18 to over 55. Specially, for/among people aged 18-34, the highest figure goes to sorting out finance problem, about 35%, but in the group of those aged 35-54, sorting out healthcare has the highest percentage, it overcomes 35% With people over 55, the figures are the same as those aged 35-54. Besides, finding schools for children has the lowest portion in three factors. In addition, the percentage of sorting out finances has risen and then fallen unstably, it has the same figures with other problems. However, with the figures of sorting out finances and healthcare, the changes doesn’t seem too much from 18 to over 55 years of age. Finding schools for my children has dramatically increased and decreased, specially it has peaked at 6% in the age of 18-34, then it has reached nearly 20% in the next group and in over 55, it was less, with just under 3%.
The chart
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shows
information about the problems
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people
have when they
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
come
to another nation.

Overall
, there are three difficulties with
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different
levels in three groups of
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people
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aged
from 18 to
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over
55.

Specially
, for/among
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people
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aged
18-34, the highest
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figure
goes to
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sorting
out finance problem, about 35%,
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but
in the group of those
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aged
35-54,
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sorting
out healthcare has the highest percentage, it overcomes 35% With
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people
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
over
55, the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
figures
are the same as those
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
aged
35-54.
Besides
, finding schools for children has the lowest portion in three factors.

In addition
, the percentage of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
sorting
out finances has risen and then fallen
unstably
, it has the same
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figures
with other problems.
However
, with the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
figures
of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
sorting
out finances and healthcare, the
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
changes
doesn’t seem too much from 18 to
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
over
55 years of age. Finding schools for my children has
dramatically
increased and decreased,
specially
it has peaked at 6% in the age of 18-34, then it has reached
nearly
20% in the
next
group and in
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
over
55, it was less, with
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
just
under 3%.

IELTS academic Problems people have when they come to another nation.

Academic
  American English
4 paragraphs
181 words
6.0
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 7.0
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • ?
    Include an introduction and conclusion
  • ?
    Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • ?
    Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.5
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.0
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 7.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • ?
    Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
  • ?
    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
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