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The given line graph illustrates the rate of students between 18 and 25 years old studying in universities in four distinctive countries namely Singapore, Malaysia, Philippines and Thailand from 1961 to 2011

The given line graph illustrates the rate of students between 18 and 25 years old studying in universities in four distinctive countries namely Singapore, Malaysia, Philippines and Thailand from 1961 to 2011 DY2VW
The given line graph illustrates the rate of students between 18 and 25 years old studying in universities in four distinctive countries namely Singapore, Malaysia, Philippines and Thailand from 1961 to 2011. As is revealed from the line chart, it is obvious that the number of people aged 18 to 25 in universities in all four countries follows the upward trend though there were differences among them over the period of 50 years. To be more specific, in 1961, the quantity of university students from 18 to 25 years old in Thailand was the highest with under 25%, tremendously higher than that in Malaysia, nearly 10% higher than Singapore. This figure then declined slightly by about 5% after 30 years before increasing dramatically and reach the highest point of almost 43% in 2011. Besides, the ratio of Singaporeans aged 18 to 25 studying in university experienced a double growth to 30% in 1971, from the initial figure of 15% in 1961 and then continue rose significantly by around 10% during the last 40 years of the period. On the other hand, standing at 2 and 7%, the percentage of citizens aged 18 to 25 in universities in Malaysia and the Philippines witnessed a considerable rise to 15% in 1991, respectively. Finally, while the number of Malaysians from 18 to 25 years old going to the university leveled off at 15%, the figure for the Philippines saw a slight increase of approximately 5% throughout the last 20 years of the period shown in the graph.
The
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
given
line graph illustrates the rate of students between 18 and 25 years
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
old
studying in
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
universities
in four distinctive countries
namely
Singapore, Malaysia, Philippines and Thailand from 1961 to 2011.

As
is revealed
from the line chart, it is obvious that the number of
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
people
aged 18 to 25 in
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
universities
in all four countries follows the upward trend though there were differences among them over the period of 50 years.

To be more specific, in 1961, the quantity of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
university
students from 18 to 25 years
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
old
in Thailand was the highest with under 25%,
tremendously
higher than that in Malaysia,
nearly
10% higher than Singapore. This figure then declined
slightly
by about 5% after 30 years
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
before
increasing
dramatically
and reach the highest point of almost 43% in 2011.
Besides
, the ratio of Singaporeans aged 18 to 25 studying in
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
university
experienced a double growth to 30% in 1971, from the initial figure of 15% in 1961 and then continue rose
significantly
by around 10% during the last 40 years of the period.

On the other hand
, standing at 2 and 7%, the percentage of citizens aged 18 to 25 in
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
universities
in Malaysia and the Philippines witnessed a considerable rise to 15% in 1991,
respectively
.
Finally
, while the number of Malaysians from 18 to 25 years
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
old
going to the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
university
leveled off at 15%, the figure for the Philippines
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
saw
a slight increase of approximately 5% throughout the last 20 years of the period shown in the graph.
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IELTS academic The given line graph illustrates the rate of students between 18 and 25 years old studying in universities in four distinctive countries namely Singapore, Malaysia, Philippines and Thailand from 1961 to 2011

Academic
  American English
4 paragraphs
254 words
6.5
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 7.0
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
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    One main idea per paragraph
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    Include an introduction and conclusion
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  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
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    Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 6.0
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.5
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 7.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
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    Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
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