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The given graph illustrstes the labour force employment in the USA from 1930 to 2010.

The given graph illustrstes the labour force employment in the USA from 1930 to 2010. 3LmWb
The given graph illustrstes the labour force employment in the USA from 1930 to 2010. Overall, there was a significant decrease in the number of employment in farming, fishing and foresting during the given period. It was also noticeable that the USA labour force employment in industrial increased sharply from 1960 to 2010. As can be seen from the graph, the number of employment in farming, fishing and foresting hit the hightest point of 75% in 1930, while that in industrial hit a low of 0. In 1940, ployment in sale and office experienced an downward trend, starting the period at approximately 13%, and falling at merely 5%. At the same times other service labour force saw a slight grow. After two decades, the employment in sale and office was 15%, two times as many as that of industrial. In term of the graph, a noticeable drop was seen in the farming, fishing and foresting labour force after 1970s. At that times other labour force rose slightly during the given period. The year 1990 saw a sharp surge in the number of industrial labour force. In 2010, the number of employment in farming, fishing and foresting hit the lowest point of 5 while that in other labour force climbed steadily. There were 30% of employment in industrial in USA whilst the figure for technical stood at 25%.
The
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given
graph
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illustrstes
the
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labour
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force
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employment
in the USA from 1930 to 2010.

Overall
, there was a significant decrease in the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
number
of
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employment
in
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
farming
,
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fishing
and foresting during the
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
given
period. It was
also
noticeable that the USA
Possible spelling mistake. 'labour' is British English.
labour
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force
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employment
in
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industrial
increased
sharply
from 1960 to 2010.

As can be
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seen
from the graph, the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
number
of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
employment
in
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
farming
,
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fishing
and foresting hit the
Possible spelling mistake found.
hightest
point of 75% in 1930, while that in
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
industrial
hit a low of 0. In 1940,
Possible spelling mistake found.
ployment
in sale and office experienced
Use "a" instead of 'an' if the following word doesn't start with a vowel sound, e.g. 'a sentence', 'a university'
an
downward trend, starting the period at approximately 13%, and falling at
merely
5%. At the same times other service
Possible spelling mistake. 'labour' is British English.
labour
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force
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
saw
a slight grow. After two decades, the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
employment
in sale and office was 15%, two times as
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
many
as that of industrial.

In term of the graph, a noticeable drop was
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
seen
in the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
farming
,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
fishing
and foresting
Possible spelling mistake. 'labour' is British English.
labour
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
force
after 1970s. At that times other
Possible spelling mistake. 'labour' is British English.
labour
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force
rose
slightly
during the
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
given
period. The year 1990
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
saw
a sharp surge in the
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number
of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
industrial
Possible spelling mistake. 'labour' is British English.
labour
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
force
. In 2010, the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
number
of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
employment
in
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
farming
,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
fishing
and foresting hit the lowest point of 5 while that in other
Possible spelling mistake. 'labour' is British English.
labour
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force
climbed
steadily
. There were 30% of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
employment
in
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
industrial
A determiner is probably missing here: "in the USA".
in USA
whilst the figure for technical stood at 25%.
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IELTS academic The given graph illustrstes the labour force employment in the USA from 1930 to 2010.

Academic
  American English
4 paragraphs
227 words
6.0
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 7.0
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
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    One main idea per paragraph
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    Include an introduction and conclusion
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    Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.0
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  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.5
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 5.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
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    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
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    Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
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