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The following bar graph shows birth rates of twins according to race, and Hispanic origin of mother in the United states, in four different years. Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevent.

The following bar graph shows birth rates of twins according to race, and Hispanic origin of mother in the United states, in four different years. q0l6r
The provided bar graph illustrates information on twins’ birth rates in the United States in four different years- 1980, 1990, 2000 and 2009. Overall, it can be seen that birth rates are categorised into all races, non-Hispanic White, non-Hispanic Black and Hispanic, and also the birth rates are measured on a scale of 0 to 40 per 1, 000 births. To begin with, non-Hispanic black has recorded the highest twins birth rate throughout the given four different periods. In 1980, it recorded a figure of 24. 2 which eventually increased to 38. 0, the highest figure of all period. In contrast, it can be seen from the graph that the Hispanic race has the lowest rate of twin’s birth with a figure of 16. 8, being the lowest figure of the given period, which increased gradually and hit the record of 22. 5 in the year 2009. To elaborate further, all races and non-Hispanic white has approximately similar figures in 1980 and 1990. To be more precise, all races have recorded the twin’s birth rate at the figure of 18. 9 in 1980 and 22. 6 in 1990, which is quite close to the figures of non-Hispanic white. It recorded the figures of 18. 3 and 23. 5 respectively. However, the birth rate surged significantly in both races, hitting 33. 2 and 37. 0 per 1, 000 birth rates sequentially after 20 years.
The provided bar graph illustrates information on
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twins’
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birth
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rates
in the United States in four
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
different
years- 1980, 1990, 2000 and 2009.
Overall
, it can be
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seen
that
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birth
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rates
are
Possible spelling mistake. 'categorised' is British English.
categorised
into all
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races
, non-Hispanic White, non-Hispanic Black and Hispanic, and
also
the
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birth
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rates
are measured
on a scale of 0 to 40 per 1, 000 births.

To
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begin
with, non-Hispanic black has
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recorded
the highest
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twins
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birth
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rate
throughout the
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given
four
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different
periods. In 1980, it
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recorded
a
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figure
of 24. 2 which
eventually
increased to 38. 0, the highest
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figure
of all period.
In contrast
, it can be
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
seen
from the graph that the Hispanic
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race
has the lowest
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rate
of
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twin’s
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birth
with a
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figure
of 16. 8, being the lowest
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figure
of the
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
given
period, which increased
gradually
and hit the record of 22. 5 in the year 2009.

To elaborate
further
, all
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races
and non-Hispanic white has approximately similar
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figures
in 1980 and 1990. To be more precise, all
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races
have
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recorded
the
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twin’s
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
birth
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
rate
at the
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figure
of 18. 9 in 1980 and 22. 6 in 1990, which is quite close to the
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figures
of non-Hispanic white. It
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recorded
the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
figures
of 18. 3 and 23. 5
respectively
.
However
, the
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birth
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
rate
surged
significantly
in both
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
races
, hitting 33. 2 and 37. 0 per 1, 000
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
birth
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
rates
sequentially
after 20 years.
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IELTS academic The following bar graph shows birth rates of twins according to race, and Hispanic origin of mother in the United states, in four different years.

Academic
  American English
3 paragraphs
233 words
6.5
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 7.0
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
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    One main idea per paragraph
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    Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.5
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.5
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 6.5
  • Answer all parts of the question
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    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
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    Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
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