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The first map delineates about the layout of the way towards the city hospital in 2007 while, the other map describes the changes made in the 2010.

The first map delineates about the layout of the way towards the city hospital in 2007 while, the other map describes the changes made in the 2010. 7rjmb
The first map delineates about the layout of the way towards the city hospital in 2007 while, the other map describes the changes made in the 2010. Firstly, in the year 2007, there were three bus stops on either side of the hospital roads however, in 2010, the new bus station on the left side on the same road. In addition to that, by 2010, two roundabouts had been added, at the junctions of Hospital Road with the ring road and with City Road respectively. Moreover, there was a car park for staff and the public on the southeast side of the ring road in 2007. Nevertheless, in 2010, it had become a staff-only car park, and a new public car park built on the east side of the ring road. Overall, it is readily apparent that the largest changes involved transportation, including additional public parking, the construction of a nearby bus station and new roundabouts.
The
first
map delineates about the layout of the way towards the city hospital in 2007 while, the other map
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
describes
the
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
changes
made in the 2010.

Firstly
, in the year 2007, there were three bus
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
stops
on either side of the hospital
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
roads
however
, in 2010, the new bus station on the
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
left
side on the same
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
road
.
In addition
to that, by 2010, two roundabouts had been
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
added
, at the junctions of Hospital
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
Road
with the ring
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
road
and with City
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
Road
respectively
.
Moreover
, there was a car park for staff and the public on the southeast side of the ring
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
road
in 2007.
Nevertheless
, in 2010, it had become a staff-
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
only
car park, and a new public car park

This sentence does not start with an uppercase letter
built
on the east side of the ring road.

Overall
, it is
readily
apparent that the largest
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
changes
involved transportation, including additional public parking, the construction of a nearby bus station and new roundabouts.
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IELTS academic The first map delineates about the layout of the way towards the city hospital in 2007 while, the other map describes the changes made in the 2010.

Academic
  American English
4 paragraphs
156 words
6.5
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 7.0
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • ?
    Include an introduction and conclusion
  • ?
    Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • ?
    Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 6.0
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.5
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 6.5
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • ?
    Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
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