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Consumption of fast food per person in gram in Britain

Consumption of fast food per person in gram in Britain oVox9
In order to depict the in take of junk by the citizens of Britain, the given linear chart is used. The data is calibrated in grams. In overall analysis, it is worth noticing that maximum of the people ate fish while hamburger was consumed by least number of people, but almost same amount of individuals ate pizza during twenty years. After careful analysis, it is crystal clear that although the grams of hamburgers increased gradually to around 100 grams in 1980 from approximately 30 grams in 1970, then this value rose to 300 grams in 1990. Moving further to another food, even though the consumption of fish and chips increased gradually from below 100 grams and this figure inclined drastically to 500 grams. Turning attention to left data, while the grams of consumption of pizza dropped gradually to above 200 grams in 1980 which accounted for 300 grams in 1970 and this count remained same in 1990.
In order to depict the in take of junk by the citizens of Britain, the
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
given
linear chart is
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
used
. The data
is calibrated
in grams.

In
overall
analysis, it is worth noticing that maximum of the
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
people
ate fish while hamburger
was consumed
by least number of
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
people
,
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
but
almost same amount of individuals ate pizza during twenty years.

After careful analysis, it is crystal
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
clear
that although the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
grams
of hamburgers increased
gradually
to around 100
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
grams
in 1980 from approximately 30
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
grams
in 1970, then this value rose to 300
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
grams
in 1990.

Moving
further
to another food,
even though
the consumption of fish and chips increased
gradually
from below 100
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
grams
and this figure inclined
drastically
to 500 grams.

Turning attention to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
left
data, while the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
grams
of consumption of pizza dropped
gradually
to above 200
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
grams
in 1980 which accounted for 300
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
grams
in 1970 and this count remained same in 1990.
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IELTS academic Consumption of fast food per person in gram in Britain

Academic
  American English
5 paragraphs
157 words
6.5
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 5.5
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
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    Include an introduction and conclusion
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    Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
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    Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 6.0
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.5
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 7.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • ?
    Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
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