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The diagrams below show the changes in the ground floor plan of an office between 2010 and 2016

The diagrams below show the changes in the ground floor plan of an office between 2010 and 2016 7do6
The map illustrate the transformation about floor plan in the 2010 and 2016 years. It is clear that the office building has been constructed in 2016 to replace for the old site. Overall, the office has built a large number of rooms. In 2010, in the north of the entrance door the reception desk had been rebuilt and it has in the south of entrance door in 2016. In 2010, on the left hand three office workers room and on the right hand two office workers room had been erected. One more building had been erected in the 2010.
The map
Possible agreement error - use third-person verb forms for singular and mass nouns: "illustrates".
illustrate
the transformation about floor plan in the 2010 and 2016 years. It is
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
clear
that the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
office
building has
been constructed
in 2016 to replace for the
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
old
site.
Overall
, the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
office
has built
Specify a number, remove phrase, or simply use "many" or "numerous"
a large number of
rooms. In 2010, in the north of the entrance door the reception desk had been rebuilt and it has in the south of entrance door in 2016. In 2010, on the
Did you mean the adjective "left-hand"?
left hand
three
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
office
workers room and on the
Did you mean the adjective "right-hand"?
right hand
two
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
office
workers room had
been erected
. One more building had
been erected
in the 2010.
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Learning another language is not only learning different words for the same things, but learning another way to think about things.
Flora Lewis

IELTS academic The diagrams below show the changes in the ground floor plan of an office between 2010 and 2016

Academic
  American English
1 paragraphs
99 words
This writing has been penalized,
text can't be
less than 250 words in Task 2
and less than 150 words in Task 1
5.0
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 5.5
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • ?
    Include an introduction and conclusion
  • ?
    Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • ?
    Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 6.5
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.0
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 5.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • ?
    Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
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