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The diagram shows the producing the tea and making a cup of tea

The diagram shows the producing the tea and making a cup of tea R5eyM
The graph illustrates how tea is manufactured and preparation process of a cup of tea. Overall, the production of tea involves 7 stages linear process that begins with sowing the seeds and ending up with carrying them to shops. Making a cup of tea is a second stage that includes 10 phases. First of all, the tea seeds are sown, then they grow exposed to the sunshine. When the plants grow they are collected by the farmer. The following step is spreading the tea leaves under the sun in order to evaporate their moisture. After the tea leaves are dried they are then boxed and put into trucks. Boxed leaves are carried to the markets by lorries. When consumers buy the tea, they bring them to home in order to make a cup of drink. These 8 steps are done in order. The kettle is filled with water. Having boiled, water is mixed with a tea bag. While waiting for a several minutes, milk or sugar can be added which gives it extra taste. The last step is to consume it
The graph illustrates how
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
tea
is manufactured
and preparation process of a cup of tea.

Overall
, the production of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
tea
involves 7 stages linear process that
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
begins
with sowing the seeds and ending up with carrying them to shops. Making a cup of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
tea
is a second stage that includes 10 phases.

This phrase is redundant. Consider using "first".
First of all
, the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
tea
seeds
are sown
, then they grow exposed to the sunshine.
“When” at the beginning of a sentence usually requires a 2nd clause. Maybe a comma, question or exclamation mark is missing, or the sentence is incomplete and should be joined with the following sentence.
When
the plants grow they
are collected
by the farmer. The following step is spreading the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
tea
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
leaves
under the sun in order to evaporate their moisture. After the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
tea
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
leaves
are dried
they are then boxed and put into trucks. Boxed
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
leaves
are carried
to the markets by lorries.

When consumers
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
buy
the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
tea
, they bring them to home in order to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
make
a cup of drink. These 8 steps
are done
in order. The kettle
is filled
with water. Having boiled, water
is mixed
with a
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
tea
bag. While waiting for a several minutes, milk or sugar can be
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
added
which gives it extra taste. The last step is to consume
Please add a punctuation mark at the end of paragraph
it
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IELTS academic The diagram shows the producing the tea and making a cup of tea

Academic
  American English
4 paragraphs
180 words
6.0
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 7.0
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • ?
    Include an introduction and conclusion
  • ?
    Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • ?
    Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 6.0
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.5
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 5.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • ?
    Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
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    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
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