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The diagram shows how chocolate is produced.

The diagram shows how chocolate is produced. 0nnDn
The given process illustrates the manufacture of chocolate. It is obviously observed that the process of producing chocolate includes 10 steps, which embarks with cacao trees planted in different countries and completes with the chocolate production. Initially, cacao tree is planted in three disparate areas named S. A, A and In. Once the pods are ripe and red, they are harvested so as to collect the white cocao beans lying in them. having been through the fermentation process, beans are contained in a giant tray and spread in sun to dry. After that, these arid beans are packaged in spacious sacks and delivered by train to lorry. Having been taken to factory, beans are roasted in the high temperatures of 350 degrees. In the following step, roasted beans are crushed by a machine to remove the outer shell. After that, the inner part is pressed into liquid, then the chocolate is produced
The
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
given
process illustrates the manufacture of chocolate. It is
obviously
observed that the process of producing chocolate includes 10 steps, which embarks with cacao trees planted in
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
different
countries and completes with the chocolate production.
Initially
, cacao tree
is planted
in three disparate areas named S. A, A and In. Once the pods are ripe and red, they
are harvested
'So as to' expresses purpose and is used in formal texts. Consider using "to"
so as to
collect the white
Possible spelling mistake found.
cocao
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
beans
lying in them.
This sentence does not start with an uppercase letter
having
been through the fermentation process,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
beans
are contained
in a giant tray and spread in sun to dry. After that, these arid
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
beans
are packaged
in spacious sacks and delivered by train to lorry. Having
been taken
to factory,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
beans
are roasted
in the high temperatures of 350 degrees. In the following step, roasted
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
beans
are crushed
by a machine to remove the outer shell. After that, the inner part
is pressed
into liquid, then the chocolate is
Please add a punctuation mark at the end of paragraph
produced
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IELTS academic The diagram shows how chocolate is produced.

Academic
  American English
1 paragraphs
151 words
5.5
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 5.0
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • ?
    Include an introduction and conclusion
  • ?
    Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • ?
    Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 6.0
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.5
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 5.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • ?
    Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
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    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
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