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The diagram below shows the various stages involved in producing whiskey from malt barley

The diagram below shows the various stages involved in producing whiskey from malt barley alaRd
The image indicates several phases to manufacture whiskey from malt barely. Overall, the process starts with growing of malt barely and ends with consumption of final product. In total there are 12 steps which requiring different machinery and some manual work. First of all, the malt barely is grown and after that it harvested. The harvested malt barely is then putted in machine for preparation before adding to another piece of machinery where it is mashed. Following that, another machine is used to fermentation of the mashed malt barely. After fermentation, the malt barely turned to first and second distillation machines. From this, the resulting substance moved to next step, which is ageing, to send to the next one which is bottling by automated machine. After bottling, it delivered to be traded and subsequently consumed.
The image indicates several phases to manufacture whiskey from
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
malt
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
barely
.
Overall
, the process
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
starts
with growing of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
malt
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
barely
and ends with consumption of final product. In total there are 12 steps which requiring
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
different
machinery and
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
manual work.

This phrase is redundant. Consider using "first".
First of all
, the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
malt
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
barely
is grown
and after that it harvested. The harvested
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
malt
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
barely
is then putted in
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
machine
for preparation
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
before
adding to another piece of machinery where it
is mashed
. Following that, another
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
machine
is
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
used
to fermentation of the mashed
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
malt
barely
.

After fermentation, the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
malt
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
barely
turned to
first
and second distillation
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
machines
. From this, the resulting substance
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
moved
to
next
step, which is
Possible spelling mistake. 'ageing' is British English.
ageing
, to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
send
to the
next
one which is bottling by automated
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
machine
. After bottling, it delivered to
be traded
and
subsequently
consumed.
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IELTS academic The diagram below shows the various stages involved in producing whiskey from malt barley

Academic
  American English
3 paragraphs
135 words
This writing has been penalized,
text can't be
less than 250 words in Task 2
and less than 150 words in Task 1
5.0
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 7.0
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • ?
    Include an introduction and conclusion
  • ?
    Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • ?
    Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.5
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.5
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 5.5
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • ?
    Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
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    Currently is not available
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