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THE DIAGRAM BELOW SHOWS HOW ELECTRICITY IS GENERATED IN A HYDROELECTRIC POWER STATION

THE DIAGRAM BELOW SHOWS HOW ELECTRICITY IS GENERATED IN A HYDROELECTRIC POWER STATION d378X
THE DIAGRAM ILLUSTRATES THE VARIOUS STEPS WHICH INVOLVED IN THE PRODUCTION OF ELECTRIC CURRENT THROUGH A HYDROELECTRIC POWER STATION. OVERALL THE GENERATION OF ELECTRICTY CONSISTS OF DIFFERENT STAGES, WHICH STARTS FROM THE RIVER WATER AND LATER IT WILL BE CONVERTED TO ELECTRIC POWER. THIS PROCESS WILL HAPPEN AT DAY AND NIGHT. THE WATER FROM THE RIVER FLOWS TO A HIGH-LEVEL RESERVOIR WHERE THERE IS A DAM NEAR BY IT. DURING DAY TIME, THE DAM WILL BE OPENED AND THE WATER FLOWS THROUGH IT AND TO GENERATE POWER IT REACHES THE POWER STATION WHICH HAS A GENERATOR AND IT WORKS AS REVERSIBLE TURBINES WHEN IT IS NOT NIGHT AND FURTHER IT WILL BE GENERATED AS POWER LINES AND WILL BE SUPPLIED TO THE NATIONAL GRIDS. ALSO THE REMAINING WATER WILL BE CARRIED TO A LOW LEVEL RESERVOIR. ON THE OTHER HAND AT NIGHT THE RIVER WATER FROM THE LOW-LEVEL RESERVOIR WILL BE CARRIED BACK TO THE GENERATOR, FROM THERE IT WILL BE PUMPED BACK TO THE HIGH LEVEL RESERVOIR WHER THE DAM WILL BE CLOSED.
THE DIAGRAM ILLUSTRATES THE VARIOUS STEPS WHICH INVOLVED IN THE PRODUCTION OF ELECTRIC
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
CURRENT
THROUGH A HYDROELECTRIC
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POWER
STATION.

OVERALL
THE GENERATION OF
Possible spelling mistake found.
ELECTRICTY
CONSISTS OF
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
DIFFERENT
STAGES, WHICH
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
STARTS
FROM THE RIVER
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WATER
AND LATER IT WILL
BE CONVERTED
TO ELECTRIC
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
POWER
. THIS PROCESS WILL HAPPEN AT DAY AND NIGHT.

THE
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WATER
FROM THE RIVER FLOWS TO A HIGH-LEVEL RESERVOIR WHERE THERE IS A DAM
Did you mean "nearby"?
NEAR BY
IT. DURING DAY TIME, THE DAM WILL
BE OPENED
AND THE
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WATER
FLOWS THROUGH IT AND TO GENERATE
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
POWER
IT REACHES THE
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
POWER
STATION WHICH HAS A GENERATOR AND IT WORKS AS REVERSIBLE TURBINES WHEN IT IS NOT NIGHT AND
FURTHER
IT WILL
BE GENERATED
AS
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
POWER
LINES AND WILL
BE SUPPLIED
TO THE NATIONAL GRIDS.
Did you forget a comma after a conjunctive/linking adverb?
ALSO
THE REMAINING
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WATER
WILL
BE CARRIED
TO A LOW LEVEL RESERVOIR.

ON THE OTHER HAND
AT NIGHT THE RIVER
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
WATER
FROM THE LOW-LEVEL RESERVOIR WILL
BE CARRIED
BACK TO THE GENERATOR, FROM THERE IT WILL
BE PUMPED
BACK TO THE HIGH LEVEL RESERVOIR
Possible spelling mistake found.
WHER
THE DAM WILL
BE CLOSED
.
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IELTS academic THE DIAGRAM BELOW SHOWS HOW ELECTRICITY IS GENERATED IN A HYDROELECTRIC POWER STATION

Academic
  American English
4 paragraphs
174 words
6.0
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 7.0
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    Include an introduction and conclusion
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    Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.0
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.5
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 5.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
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    Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
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