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The charts illustrate the consumption of water in three factors consists of San Diego Country, California and Worldwide.

The charts illustrate the consumption of water in three factors consists of San Diego Country, California and Worldwide. jVD58
The charts illustrate the consumption of water in three factors consists of San Diego Country, California and Worldwide. Overall, Residential in San Diego and California got amount of water which is opposed to Worldwide. In addition, both country really developed with the low percentage. On the one hand, the water of households was only 8% in the rest of the world. In the meanwhile, The high rate in San Diego Country and California was 60% and 39%, respectively. On the other hand, Agriculture was really low percentage in San Diego and California which show developed nation, in percificly, 17% and 28%. While, only fraction of 8% water usage in over the world. For industry water consumption, all three country spend all most the same amount of water usage. San Diego Country and the rest of the world have an equal amount of water useage of 23%. California uses 10% higher at 33%. California can be seen with balanced development of water usage in three fields.
The charts illustrate the consumption of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
water
in three factors consists of San Diego
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Country
, California and Worldwide.

Overall
, Residential in San Diego and California
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
got
amount of
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water
which
is opposed
to Worldwide.
In addition
, both
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country
really
developed with the low percentage.

On the one hand, the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
water
of households was
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
only
8% in the rest of the world. In the meanwhile, The high rate in San Diego
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
Country
and California was 60% and 39%,
respectively
.
On the other hand
, Agriculture was
really
low percentage in San Diego and California which
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
show
developed nation, in
Possible spelling mistake found.
percificly
, 17% and 28%.
“While” at the beginning of a sentence usually requires a 2nd clause. Maybe a comma, question or exclamation mark is missing, or the sentence is incomplete and should be joined with the following sentence.
While
,
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
only
fraction of 8%
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
water
usage in over the world.

For industry
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water
consumption, all three
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country
spend all most the same amount of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
water
usage. San Diego
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Country
and the rest of the world have an equal amount of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
water
Possible spelling mistake found.
useage
of 23%. California
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
uses
10% higher at 33%. California can be
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
seen
with balanced development of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
water
usage in three fields.

IELTS academic The charts illustrate the consumption of water in three factors consists of San Diego Country, California and Worldwide.

Academic
  American English
4 paragraphs
165 words
6.0
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 7.0
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
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    Include an introduction and conclusion
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    Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • ?
    Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.0
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.5
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 5.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • ?
    Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
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