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The charts compare the amount of water used for agriculture, industry and homes around the world, and water use in Brazil and the Democratic Republic of Congo.

The charts compare the amount of water used for agriculture, industry and homes around the world, and water use in Brazil and the Democratic Republic of Congo. b1DP
The charts compare the amount of water used for agriculture, industry and homes around the world, and water use in Brazil and the Democratic Republic of Congo. It is clear that global water needs rose significantly between 1900 and 2000, and that agriculture accounted for the largest proportion of water used. We can also see that water consumption was considerably higher in Brazil than in the Congo. In 1900, around 500km³ of water was used by the agriculture sector worldwide. The figures for industrial and domestic water consumption stood at around one fifth of that amount. By 2000, global water use for agriculture had increased to around 3000km³, industrial water use had risen to just under half that amount, and domestic consumption had reached approximately 500km³. In the year 2000, the populations of Brazil and the Congo were 176 million and 5. 2 million respectively. Water consumption per person in Brazil, at 359m³, was much higher than that in the Congo, at only 8m³, and this could be explained by the fact that Brazil had 265 times more irrigated land.
The charts compare the amount of
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water
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
used
for
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agriculture
, industry and homes
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around
the world, and
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water
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use
in Brazil and the Democratic Republic of Congo.

It is
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
clear
that global
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water
needs rose
significantly
between 1900 and 2000, and that
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agriculture
accounted for the largest proportion of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
water
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
used
. We can
also
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
see
that
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water
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consumption
was
considerably
higher in Brazil than in the Congo.

In 1900,
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around
Insert a space between the numerical value and the unit symbol "500 km"
500km
³ of
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water
was
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
used
by the
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agriculture
sector worldwide. The figures for industrial and domestic
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water
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consumption
stood at
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around
one fifth of that amount. By 2000, global
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water
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
use
for
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agriculture
had increased to
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around
Insert a space between the numerical value and the unit symbol "3000 km"
3000km
³, industrial
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water
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
use
had risen to
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
just
under half that amount, and domestic
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
consumption
had reached approximately
Insert a space between the numerical value and the unit symbol "500 km"
500km
³.

In the year 2000, the populations of Brazil and the Congo were 176 million and 5. 2 million
respectively
.
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Water
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consumption
per person in Brazil, at
Insert a space between the numerical value and the unit symbol "359 m"
359m
³, was much higher than that in the Congo, at
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
only
Insert a space between the numerical value and the unit symbol "8 m"
8m
³, and this could be
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
explained
by the fact that Brazil had 265 times more irrigated land.
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IELTS academic The charts compare the amount of water used for agriculture, industry and homes around the world, and water use in Brazil and the Democratic Republic of Congo.

Academic
  American English
4 paragraphs
180 words
5.5
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 6.5
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
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    Include an introduction and conclusion
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    Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • ?
    Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.5
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 5.5
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 5.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • ?
    Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
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