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The chart shows the number of mobile phones and landlines per 100 people in selected countries. v.1

The chart shows the number of mobile phones and landlines per 100 people in selected countries. v. 1
The supplied bar graph shows data on the number of cell phone and land phone users in seven countries in the Europe and the American regions. As is observed from the presentation,   the number of landline users in Denmark, US and Canada are higher than the number of cell phone users in these countries. On the contrary, in Italy, Sweden, Denmark and Germany the cell phone users are higher in number than that of land phone users. In Italy, Sweden, UK and Denmark almost 80-90 percent people use the cell phone. Among these six countries, Italian people are highest in percent in terms of cell phone usages whereas the highest percentages of land phone users are found in Denmark which is almost 90%. The difference between cell phone and land phone users is highest in Italy and in Denmark. The lowest number of land phone users can be found in Canada. In summary, North America has more land phone users than their cell phone users and most of the European people prefer to use mobile phones over land phones.
The supplied bar graph
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shows
data on the
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number
of
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cell
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phone
and
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land
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phone
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users
in seven countries in the Europe and the American regions. As
is observed
from the presentation,
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the
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number
of landline
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users
in Denmark, US and Canada are higher than the
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number
of
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cell
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phone
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users
in these countries.
On the contrary
, in Italy, Sweden, Denmark and Germany the
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cell
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phone
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users
are higher in
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number
than that of
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land
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phone
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users
. In Italy, Sweden, UK and Denmark almost 80-90 percent
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
people
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use
the
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cell
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phone
. Among these six countries, Italian
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
people
are highest in percent in terms of
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cell
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
phone
usages whereas the highest percentages of
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land
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phone
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users
are found
in Denmark which is almost 90%. The difference between
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cell
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
phone
and
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land
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
phone
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
users
is highest in Italy and in Denmark. The lowest
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number
of
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land
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phone
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users
can
be found
in Canada.

In summary, North America has more
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land
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phone
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users
than their
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cell
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phone
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users
and most of the European
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
people
prefer to
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use
mobile
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phones
over
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
land
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
phones
.
1Linking words, meeting the goal of 7 or more
44Repeated words, meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
2Mistakes
To learn a language is to have one more window from which to look at the world.
Chinese Proverb

IELTS academic The chart shows the number of mobile phones and landlines per 100 people in selected countries. v. 1

Academic
  American English
2 paragraphs
180 words
6.0
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 5.5
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • ?
    Include an introduction and conclusion
  • ?
    Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • ?
    Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.5
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.5
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 5.5
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • ?
    Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
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    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
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