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the chart shows the number of minutes call taken by users in UK.

the chart shows the number of minutes call taken by users in UK. AgmlL
The chart shows the total time taken for three types of calls namely local-fixed line, national and international-fixed line, mobiles(all calls) in United Kingdom for the period of eight years, 1995 to 2002. In graph, time is reported in billions of minutes. Overall, from 1995 to 2002, the mobile calls and national and international-fixed line calls were spontaneously increased. Also, all over the years local-fixed line calls were used for long time. During 1995, time consumed by local-fixed line was about 70 billion minutes, national and international-fixed line used approximately 38 billion minutes while mobile call were the least, it took only about 2 billion minutes. Prior to 1999, it can be observed that the period of local-fixed line calls used were grown and reached its peak of exactly 90 billion minutes. Later on, even though the usage of local-fixed line call decresed gradually, it remained the highest among other calls. The least time consumed by local-fixed line calls were merely above 70 billion minutes. The highest time used by national –and- international-fixed line and local-fixed line were 61 billion minutes and 38 billion minutes(approximately) respectively.
The chart
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shows
the total
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time
taken for three types of
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calls
namely
local-
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fixed
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line
,
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national
and international-
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
fixed
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line
, mobiles(all
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calls)
A determiner is probably missing here: "in the United Kingdom".
in United Kingdom
for the period of eight years, 1995 to 2002. In graph,
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time
is reported
in
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billions
of minutes.

Overall
, from 1995 to 2002, the mobile
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calls
and
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national
and international-
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fixed
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line
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calls
were
spontaneously
increased.
Also
, all over the years local-
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fixed
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line
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calls
were
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used
for long time.

During 1995,
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time
consumed by local-
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fixed
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line
was about 70
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billion
minutes,
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national
and international-
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fixed
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line
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used
approximately 38
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billion
minutes while mobile
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call
were the least, it took
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only
about 2
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billion
minutes. Prior to 1999, it can
be observed
that the period of local-
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
fixed
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line
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calls
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used
were grown
and reached its peak of exactly 90
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billion
minutes. Later on,
even though
the usage of local-
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fixed
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line
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call
Possible spelling mistake found.
decresed
gradually
, it remained the highest among other
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calls
. The least
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time
consumed by local-
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fixed
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line
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calls
were
merely
above 70
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billion
minutes.

The highest
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time
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
used
by
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national
–and- international-
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
fixed
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
line
and local-
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
fixed
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
line
were 61
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billion
minutes and 38
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
billion
minutes(approximately)
respectively
.

IELTS academic the chart shows the number of minutes call taken by users in UK.

Academic
  American English
4 paragraphs
186 words
6.0
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 7.0
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
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    Include an introduction and conclusion
  • ?
    Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • ?
    Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.5
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.5
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 5.5
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • ?
    Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
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