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the chart shows infomation about the habit of Australian people buying and drinking coffee and tea in 5 cities in last 4 weeks.

the chart shows infomation about the habit of Australian people buying and drinking coffee and tea in 5 cities in last 4 weeks. bQrdX
The bar chart illustrates how Australian people bought and drank coffee and tea in 5 cities in last month. Looking at the chart, it is immediately obvious that most people enjoyed going to café for coffee or tea, whereas buying fresh coffee was least popular. In addition to that, Melbourne and Hobart registered the highest percentages of residents consuming coffee and tea. The proportion of people prefer going to café was above 60% in 3 cities (Sydney, Melbourne and Hobart), with the highest figure of about 63% in Melbourne. Adelaide and Brisbane also had the fairly high percentages of about 50% and 55% respectively in this term. Instant coffee was the second favorite beverage. About 45% to 55% of residents consumed instant coffee in all 5 cities, with the lowest figure in Sydney and the highest in Hobart. In terms of fresh coffee, there was just under 35% enjoying it in Brisbane and Adelaide, while the highest proportion was in Sydney, at under 45%, in last 4 weeks.
The bar chart illustrates how Australian
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
people
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
bought
and drank
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
coffee
and tea in 5 cities in last month.

Looking at the chart, it is immediately obvious that most
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
people
enjoyed going to café for
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
coffee
or tea, whereas buying fresh
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
coffee
was least popular.
In addition
to that, Melbourne and Hobart registered the highest percentages of residents consuming
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
coffee
and tea.

The proportion of
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
people
Did you mean "prefers"?
prefer
going to café was above 60% in 3 cities (Sydney, Melbourne and Hobart), with the highest figure of about 63% in Melbourne. Adelaide and Brisbane
also
had the
fairly
high percentages of about 50% and 55%
respectively
in this term.

Instant
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
coffee
was the second favorite beverage. About 45% to 55% of residents consumed instant
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
coffee
in all 5 cities, with the lowest figure in Sydney and the highest in Hobart. In terms of fresh
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
coffee
, there was
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
just
under 35% enjoying it in Brisbane and Adelaide, while the highest proportion was in Sydney, at under 45%, in last 4 weeks.
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IELTS academic the chart shows infomation about the habit of Australian people buying and drinking coffee and tea in 5 cities in last 4 weeks.

Academic
  American English
4 paragraphs
168 words
6.5
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 7.0
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    Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 6.0
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.0
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 6.5
  • Answer all parts of the question
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    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
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    Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
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