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The chart gives the information about consumption of six goods in four European countries: Germany, Italy, France and Britain.

The chart gives the information about consumption of six goods in four European countries: Germany, Italy, France and Britain. k3gM
The bar chart depicts the information about Britain, France, Italy and Germany spent money on six various goods. To begin with, France and Germany spent money on personal stereos are similar near most 145 and Italy spent money more then 5. Britain dubble of 10 for Italy. Then Britain and Italy Invest money tennis racquets on equal that amount 155. France and Germany near about 145 to 150. Britain natives spent money on perfumes 160. Other Three countries almost 145 to 150. Moving further, the highest amount of spent money Britain was photographic film 170 and France less then 5. However Italy and Germany was 165. Germany Invest money on toys 145 and France and Germany are similar 155. Italy Invest money on CDs similar as perfumes. Along with Britain, France and Germany Invest money CDs approximate 145 to 165. Looking from an overall perspective. It Is readily apparent that Britain highest amount show interest for photographic films and lowest intrest show in personal stereos.
The bar chart depicts the information about Britain, France, Italy and Germany
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
spent
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
money
on six various
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
goods
. To
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
begin
with, France and Germany
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
spent
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
money
on personal stereos are similar near most 145 and Italy
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
spent
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
money
more
Comparison requires "than", not 'then' nor 'as'.
then
5. Britain
Possible spelling mistake found.
dubble
of 10 for Italy. Then Britain and Italy
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
Invest
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
money
tennis racquets on equal that amount 155. France and Germany near about 145 to 150.
The genitive is possibly missing.
Britain natives
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
spent
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
money
on perfumes 160. Other Three countries almost 145 to 150. Moving
further
, the highest amount of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
spent
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
money
Britain was photographic film 170 and France less
Comparison requires "than", not 'then' nor 'as'.
then
5.
Did you forget a comma after a conjunctive/linking adverb?
However
Italy and Germany was 165. Germany
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
Invest
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
money
on toys 145 and France and Germany are similar 155. Italy
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
Invest
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
money
on CDs similar as perfumes. Along with Britain, France and Germany
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
Invest
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
money
CDs approximate 145 to 165. Looking from an
overall
perspective. It Is
readily
apparent that Britain highest amount
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
show
interest for photographic films and lowest
Possible spelling mistake found.
intrest
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
show
in personal stereos.
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One language sets you in a corridor for life. Two languages open every door along the way.
Frank Smith

IELTS academic The chart gives the information about consumption of six goods in four European countries: Germany, Italy, France and Britain.

Academic
  American English
1 paragraphs
165 words
5.5
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 5.5
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • ?
    Include an introduction and conclusion
  • ?
    Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • ?
    Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.0
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.0
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 5.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • ?
    Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
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