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the chart below shows the móst imporrtant cause of stress

the chart below shows the móst imporrtant cause of stress Eq1nr
The bar chart gives information about the main reasons why people are under stress according to the age in Canada. Overall, what stands out from the chart is that there are significant differences in the reasons making people feel stress among these age groups. Looking at the details, approximately 33% of people over 74 said that they don’t know the particular reason why they are under stress, followed by people who are from 65 to 74 years old with just over 30%. The number of people aged 55-64 who have no particular reason when getting stressed was more than three times the number of people of another group with figures of 17% and 5%. For health problems, people in the oldest age group worry about this reason more than other groups, with around 24%, followed by people aged 55-64 with just over 15% and people from 25-54 feel the least stress about their physical condition. On the other hand, in terms of working too much, nearly a fourth of people aged 25-54 get stressed because of this reason while the figure for people over 74 accounted for only approximately 1%, a tiny minority. Likewise, people in the youngest age group are under stress about finance more than others, at 15%, followed by the next age group with over a tenth.
The bar chart gives information about the main
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reasons
why
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people
are under
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stress
according to the
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age
in Canada.
Overall
, what stands out from the chart is that there are significant differences in the
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reasons
making
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people
feel
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
stress
among these
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age
groups.

Looking at the
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details
, approximately 33% of
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people
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over
74 said that they don’t know the particular
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reason
why they are under
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stress
, followed by
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people
who are from 65 to 74 years
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old
with
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just
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
over
30%. The number of
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people
aged 55-64 who have no particular
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reason
when getting
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
stressed
was more than three times the number of
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people
of another
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group
with figures of 17% and 5%. For health problems,
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people
in the oldest
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age
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
group
worry about this
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reason
more than other
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groups
, with around 24%, followed by
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people
aged 55-64 with
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
just
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
over
15% and
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people
from 25-54 feel the least
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stress
about their physical condition.

On the other hand
, in terms of working too much,
nearly
a fourth of
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people
aged 25-54
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
get
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
stressed
because of this
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reason
while the figure for
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people
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over
74 accounted for
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only
approximately 1%, a tiny minority.
Likewise
,
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people
in the youngest
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age
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
group
are under
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
stress
about finance more than others, at 15%, followed by the
next
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
age
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
group
with
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
over
a tenth.
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IELTS academic the chart below shows the móst imporrtant cause of stress

Academic
  American English
3 paragraphs
220 words
6.5
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 7.0
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • ?
    Include an introduction and conclusion
  • ?
    Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • ?
    Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.5
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.0
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 7.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • ?
    Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
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