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The graphs below show the number of participants in the Olympics since it began.

The graphs below show the number of participants in the Olympics since it began. X7jMq
The bar and line graph show the number of people take part in the Olympics from 1924 to 2012. While the bar chart compares the number of participants between female and male, the line graph illustrates the total number of participants in the same period. Overall, there was an upward trend of the number of people participated in the Olympics over the period of 88 years in both graph. The participants who were men is more than women in bar chart, whereas the line saw an steady increase in the number of participants in both gender. The bar chart shows that in the Olympics, the number of men join in take over the number of women, at 3000 people at the beginning. In contrast, the number of women competitors at that time were just below 100 people, but then rise dramatically to just under 5000 at the end of the period. The number of male participants still higher than female in 2012, by nearly 1200 people. The line graph saw an steady climb of the number of participants from around 2500 to just over 7000 people between 1924 and 1984, then this number reached a peak at over 1000 people in 2012.
The bar and
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line
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graph
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
show
the
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number
of
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people
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
take part
in the Olympics from 1924 to 2012. While the bar chart compares the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
number
of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
participants
between female and male, the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
line
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graph
illustrates the total
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number
of
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participants
in the same period.

Overall
, there was an upward trend of the
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number
of
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people
participated in the Olympics
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over
the period of 88 years in both
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graph
. The
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participants
who were
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men
is more than women in bar chart, whereas the
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line
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
saw
Use "a" instead of 'an' if the following word doesn't start with a vowel sound, e.g. 'a sentence', 'a university'
an
steady increase in the
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number
of
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participants
in both gender.

The bar chart
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shows
that in the Olympics, the
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number
of
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
men
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
join
in take
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over
the
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number
of women, at 3000
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people
at the beginning.
In contrast
, the
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number
of women competitors at that time were
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
just
below 100
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people
,
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but
then rise
dramatically
to
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just
under 5000 at the
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end
of the period. The
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number
of male
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participants
Did you mean "stills"?
still
higher than female in 2012, by
nearly
1200
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
people
.

The
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line
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
graph
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
saw
Use "a" instead of 'an' if the following word doesn't start with a vowel sound, e.g. 'a sentence', 'a university'
an
steady climb of the
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number
of
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participants
from around 2500 to
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
just
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over
7000
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people
between 1924 and 1984, then this
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number
reached a peak at
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over
1000
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
in 2012.
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IELTS academic The graphs below show the number of participants in the Olympics since it began.

Academic
  American English
4 paragraphs
202 words
6.0
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 7.0
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    Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.5
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Grammatical Range: 6.0
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  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 5.0
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    Present relevant ideas
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