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The chart below show what UK graduate and postgraduate students who did not go into full-time work did after leaving college in 2008.

The chart below show what UK graduate and postgraduate students who did not go into full-time work did after leaving college in 2008. 85M6r
The illustrations provide information on the number of UK graduate and postgraduate students who did not work full-time work, after abandoning their college in 2008. Overall, the first quick look shows that few students preferred to do voluntary work; however, the majority followed further study. A noticeable amount of college leavers were in a part-time job. Concerning the analysis of the graduate students, 29, 665 ambitious students out of 30, 000, persuaded their study besides the bachelor's degree, whereas ninefold of the whole decided to be a volunteer. The graduates who were unemployed and doing part-time work were shown with a similar trend in 2008. By contrast, this ratio for the ones who did not work was still constant, while the same pattern for the part-time workers rocketed significantly. In terms of the postgraduates, the highest portion of them opted for to get an education, and the number of people who worked as a volunteer had no change in the differences of the total amount. The number of students who went on studying and the others who earned money was demonstrated by almost the same quantity, with 2, 725 and 2, 535, respectively.
The illustrations provide information on the number of UK graduate and postgraduate
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
students
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
who
did not
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
work
full-time
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
work
, after abandoning their college in 2008.

Overall
, the
first
quick look
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
shows
that few
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
students
preferred to do voluntary
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
work
;
however
, the majority followed
further
study. A noticeable amount of college leavers were in a part-time job.

Concerning the analysis of the graduate
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
students
, 29, 665 ambitious
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
students
out of 30, 000, persuaded their study
besides
the bachelor's degree, whereas ninefold of the whole decided to be a volunteer. The graduates
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
who
were unemployed
and doing part-time
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
work
were shown
with a similar trend in 2008. By contrast, this ratio for the ones
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
who
did not
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
work
was
still
constant, while the same pattern for the part-time workers rocketed
significantly
.

In terms of the postgraduates, the highest portion of them opted for to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
get
an education, and the number of
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
people
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
who
worked as a volunteer had no
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
change
in the differences of the total amount. The number of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
students
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
who
went on studying and the others
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
who
earned money
was demonstrated
by almost the same quantity, with 2, 725 and 2, 535,
respectively
.

IELTS academic The chart below show what UK graduate and postgraduate students who did not go into full-time work did after leaving college in 2008.

Academic
  American English
4 paragraphs
193 words
6.0
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 7.0
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • ?
    Include an introduction and conclusion
  • ?
    Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • ?
    Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.5
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.5
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 7.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • ?
    Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
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