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the chart below gives dataabout

the chart below gives dataabout jbVEL
The diagram illustrates the proportion of internet users, categorized by age groups. Overall, The percentage of internet users slightly downward trends and the optium age which used social media the most, was 16-30 age group There was a enormous increase in the percentage of internet users from 16-30 age group in three years with figures to be over 50% in 1998, 45% in 1999 and 44% in 2000. Besides the percentage of internet users of 31-50 age group accounted for over 40%in 1998, compared with under 40% in 1999 and 38% in 2000. Althought less than 15 age group and 50 or more age group had the data the lowest, the proportion of internet users in this age dramatically increased. Only 1% was the figures of internet users in less than 15 age group then It increased to 9% in 2000. Besides the proportion of internet users in 50 or more age group made up 3%, 8%, 10% in 1998, 1999, 2000, respectively.
The diagram illustrates the proportion of internet
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users
, categorized by
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age
groups.

Overall
, The percentage of internet
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users
slightly
downward trends and the
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optium
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age
which
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
used
social media the most, was 16-30
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age
group

There was
Use "an" instead of 'a' if the following word starts with a vowel sound, e.g. 'an article', 'an hour'
a
enormous increase in the percentage of internet
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users
from 16-30
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age
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
group
in three years with figures to be over 50% in 1998, 45% in 1999 and 44% in 2000.
Besides
the percentage of internet
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users
of 31-50
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age
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group
accounted for over 40%in 1998, compared with under 40% in 1999 and 38% in 2000.

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Althought
less than 15
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age
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group
and 50 or more
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age
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
group
had the data the lowest, the proportion of internet
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users
in this
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age
dramatically
increased.
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Only
1% was the figures of internet
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users
in less than 15
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age
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group
then It increased to 9% in 2000.
Besides
the proportion of internet
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users
in 50 or more
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
age
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
group
made up 3%, 8%, 10% in 1998, 1999, 2000,
respectively
.
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IELTS academic the chart below gives dataabout

Academic
  American English
3 paragraphs
163 words
6.0
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 7.0
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
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    One main idea per paragraph
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    Include an introduction and conclusion
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    Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • ?
    Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.5
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.0
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 5.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
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    Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
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