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the changes of a school layout

the changes of a school layout ABNDe
The two maps illustrate the layout of a school in 2004 and its proposed developments in 2024. Overall, there will be numerous significant changes in the school’s facilities such as the relocation of the sports field or the construction of a new school building. Furthermore, the number of students is expected to increase considerably to 1000 students. Firstly, they will connect school building 1 with school building 2; therefore, the length of the path will be reduced. Secondly, the sports field is going to be converted into a new school building, and they will construct a new one which is only half of its previous size on the opposite side of the road. They also expect to demolish a part of the forest to make way for a new parking lot, which will be erected to meet the students’ requirement of car parking. Moreover, this road will connect car park 1 and the entrance, which is convenient for students. Other areas, namely the main road or the southern forest are proposed to remain as they were.
The two maps illustrate the layout of a
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
school
in 2004 and its proposed developments in 2024.

Overall
, there will be numerous significant
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
changes
in the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
school’s
facilities such as the relocation of the sports field or the construction of a
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
new
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
school
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
building
.
Furthermore
, the number of students is
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
expected
to increase
considerably
to 1000 students.

Firstly
, they will connect
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
school
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
building
1 with
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
school
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
building
2;
therefore
, the length of the path will be
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
reduced
.
Secondly
, the sports field is going to
be converted
into a
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
new
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
school
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
building
, and they will construct a
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
new
one which is
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
only
half of its previous size on the opposite side of the road.

They
also
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
expect
to demolish a part of the forest to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
make
way for a
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
new
parking lot, which will
be erected
to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
meet
the students’ requirement of car parking.
Moreover
, this road will connect car park 1 and the entrance, which is convenient for students. Other areas,
namely
the main road or the southern forest
are proposed
to remain as they were.
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IELTS academic the changes of a school layout

Academic
  American English
4 paragraphs
176 words
6.5
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 7.0
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • ?
    Include an introduction and conclusion
  • ?
    Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • ?
    Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.5
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.5
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 7.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • ?
    Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
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    Currently is not available
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