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the bar graph shows the percentage of people going to cinema in a european country between 2003 and 2007 in week. make comparision where ever relevant.

the bar graph shows the percentage of people going to cinema in a european country between 2003 and 2007 in week. make comparision where ever relevant. 1VOVq
The bar chart illustrates the proportion of individuals going to cinema in a European country from 2003 to 2007 during seven days of the week. Units are measured in numbers. According to the bar chart, in the year 2003 lowest proportion of people went to cinema on Monday and Thursday which was less than 15 whereas the figure for Friday and Sunday was similar at 30. Moreover, in 2005 on Saturday the figure was highest which was 45 on the contrary on Monday and on Wednesday percentage of visiting people were same at 14. Mostly people were not interested in visiting cinema on Thursday. It is noticeable that, in the year 2005 populace going to cinema on Sunday and Saturday was slightly decreased at 43 and 33 respectively. On Friday the figure remained stable at 30. In addition, the percentage of visiting people on Monday, Wednesday and on Thursday was 12, 9 and nearly 15 respectively in comparision the number of people slightly decreased on Tuesday. Overall, majority of people prefer to visit threatres on Saturday as compared to other days.
The bar chart illustrates the proportion of individuals going to
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
cinema
in a European country from 2003 to 2007 during seven days of the week. Units
are measured
in numbers.

According to the bar chart, in the year 2003 lowest proportion of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
went to
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
cinema
on Monday and Thursday which was less than 15 whereas the figure for Friday and Sunday was similar at 30.
Moreover
, in 2005 on Saturday the figure was highest which was 45
on the contrary
on Monday and on Wednesday percentage of visiting
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
were same at 14.
Mostly
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
were not interested in visiting
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
cinema
on Thursday.

It is noticeable that, in the year 2005 populace going to
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
cinema
on Sunday and Saturday was
slightly
decreased at 43 and 33
respectively
. On Friday the figure remained stable at 30.
In addition
, the percentage of visiting
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
on Monday, Wednesday and on Thursday was 12, 9 and
nearly
15
respectively
in
Possible spelling mistake found.
comparision
the number of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
slightly
decreased on Tuesday.

Overall
,
It seems that an article is missing.
majority of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
prefer to visit
Possible spelling mistake found.
threatres
on Saturday as compared to other days.
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IELTS academic the bar graph shows the percentage of people going to cinema in a european country between 2003 and 2007 in week. make comparision where ever relevant.

Academic
  American English
4 paragraphs
181 words
6.0
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 7.0
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • ?
    Include an introduction and conclusion
  • ?
    Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • ?
    Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.0
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.5
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 5.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • ?
    Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
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