Do you want to improve your writing? Try our new evaluation service and get detailed feedback.
Check Your Text it's free

The bar chart provide information about the ratio of five different industries’ contribution of Brazil’s economy in year 2009 and 2019 with prediction for 2029.

The bar chart provide information about the ratio of five different industries’ contribution of Brazil’s economy in year 2009 and 2019 with prediction for 2029. QlWex
The bar chart provide information about the ratio of five different industries’ contribution of Brazil’s economy in year 2009 and 2019 with prediction for 2029. Overall, it can be seen that finance has a biggest contribution. Meanwhile food processing had a lowest participant in economy which changed in 2019 to manufacturing and will remain same in next decade. Starting with finance, it shows continues upward trend, started with just above 30% in year 2009 and it’s predicted that it will cover two-fifth of proportion in year 2029. Food processing picked in year 2019 and reached to just above 20% from 10% in year 2009, and according to forecast it will again reach the same level as 2009 in 2029. Manufacturing provides downward trend, started with just above one-fifth and will decline by 15% and will reach at 5%. Moving forward to tourism, it was a second largest contribution with around a quarter of Brazil’s economy in year 2009, which showed a little declined of 5% in next decade and will remain same in year 2029. Last but not the list, oil, coal and gas show fluctuation in its proportion started with just above 25% and reached to around 30% and will again reach to same level after decade.
The bar chart provide information about the ratio of five
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
different
industries’ contribution of Brazil’s economy in
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
year
2009 and 2019 with prediction for 2029.

Overall
, it can be
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
seen
that finance has
Use "the" with the superlative.
a
biggest contribution.
Did you forget a comma after a conjunctive/linking adverb?
Meanwhile
food processing had
Use "the" with the superlative.
a
lowest participant in economy which
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
changed
in 2019 to manufacturing and will remain same in
next
decade.

Starting with finance, it
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
shows
continues upward trend,
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
started
with
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
just
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
above
30% in
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
year
2009 and it’s predicted that it will cover two-fifth of proportion in
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
year
2029. Food processing picked in
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
year
2019 and reached to
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
just
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
above
20% from 10% in
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
year
2009, and according to forecast it will again reach the same level as 2009 in 2029. Manufacturing provides downward trend,
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
started
with
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
just
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
above
one-fifth and will decline by 15% and will reach at 5%.

Moving forward to tourism, it was a second largest contribution with around a quarter of Brazil’s economy in
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
year
2009, which
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
showed
a
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
little
declined of 5% in
next
decade and will remain same in
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
year
2029. Last
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
but
not the list, oil, coal and gas
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
show
fluctuation in its proportion
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
started
with
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
just
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
above
25% and reached to around 30% and will again reach to same level after decade.
What do you think?
  • This is funny writingFunny
  • I love this writingLove
  • This writing has blown my mindWow
  • It made me angryAngry
  • It made me sadSad

IELTS academic The bar chart provide information about the ratio of five different industries’ contribution of Brazil’s economy in year 2009 and 2019 with prediction for 2029.

Academic
  American English
4 paragraphs
208 words
6.0
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 7.0
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • ?
    Include an introduction and conclusion
  • ?
    Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • ?
    Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.5
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.5
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 5.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • ?
    Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
  • ?
    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
Recent posts





Get more results for topic:
  • The bar chart provide information about the ratio of five different industries’ contribution of Brazil’s economy in year 2009 and 2019 with prediction for 2029.