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The bar chart illustrates the figures for help given by six wealthy countries from 2008 to 2010. The numbers are measured in billions

The bar chart illustrates the figures for help given by six wealthy countries from 2008 to 2010. The numbers are measured in billions rL2no
The bar chart illustrates the figures for help given by six wealthy countries from 2008 to 2010. The numbers are measured in billions At the glance, it is lucid the US contributed most of the help to developing countries. However, the numbers remain fluctuated in all the countries except Germany which was the only country with stable numbers. To begin with, in 2008 USA initiates aid with approximately $22 billion despite a slight drop in the year 2009. But the figure rose to $25 billion in 2010. Whereas UK and Japan almost showed similar values ranging within ($10 to 15 billion) in three years with some ups and downs. In contrast, there was a decline in Netherland and Sweden help when was below than one in ten. Further, Germany was the only nation whose aid was burgeoned in the following three years. In 2008 it started from $10 billion and reached $15 billion in the year 2010.
The bar chart illustrates the figures for
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
help
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
given
by six wealthy
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countries
from 2008 to 2010. The numbers
are measured
in billions

At the glance, it is lucid the US contributed most of the
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
help
to developing
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
countries
.
However
, the numbers remain fluctuated in all the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
countries
except Germany which was the
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
only
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
country
with stable numbers.

To
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
begin
with, in 2008 USA initiates aid with approximately $22
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
billion
despite a slight drop in the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
year
2009.
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
But
the figure rose to $25
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billion
in 2010. Whereas UK and Japan almost
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
showed
similar values ranging within ($10 to 15
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
billion)
in three years with
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
ups and downs.
In contrast
, there was a decline in
Possible spelling mistake found.
Netherland
and Sweden
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
help
when was
Use "(below)" to make a comparison with this adjective.
below
than one in ten.

Further
, Germany was the
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
only
nation whose aid
was burgeoned
in the following three years. In
The comma is probably missing here: "2008, it".
2008 it
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
started
from $10
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
billion
and reached $15
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
billion
in the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
year
2010.
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IELTS academic The bar chart illustrates the figures for help given by six wealthy countries from 2008 to 2010. The numbers are measured in billions

Academic
  American English
3 paragraphs
157 words
6.0
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 7.0
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • ?
    Include an introduction and conclusion
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    Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • ?
    Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.5
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.5
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 5.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • ?
    Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
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