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The bar chart gives information of transport international visitors used during their visit to New Zealand. Summarise the information

The bar chart gives information of transport international visitors used during their visit to New Zealand. 25Bg6
The bar chart gives information of transport international visitors used during their visit to New Zealand. The commonest means of transport is the car which is/accounts for nearly 70 percent of international visitors used while traveling in New Zealand. The percentage of visitors using car and coach are the second over 30 percent. The third is used train, it only 20 percent visitors used. The least of trainsport used is boat, which nearly 6 percent visitors used it. Overall, we can see car is the commonest transport visitors used but the total show we see that public transport is more popular than private transport, nearly 86 percent and nearly 70 percent.
The bar chart gives information of
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transport
international
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visitors
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
used
during their visit to New Zealand.

The commonest means of
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transport
is the car which is/accounts for
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nearly
70
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percent
of international
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
visitors
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
used
while traveling in New Zealand.
Three successive sentences begin with the same word. Consider rewording the sentence or use a thesaurus to find a synonym.
The
percentage of
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visitors
using car and coach are the second over 30
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percent
.
Three successive sentences begin with the same word. Consider rewording the sentence or use a thesaurus to find a synonym.
The
third is
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
used
train, it
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
only
20
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
percent
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
visitors
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
used
.
Three successive sentences begin with the same word. Consider rewording the sentence or use a thesaurus to find a synonym.
The
least of
Possible spelling mistake found.
trainsport
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
used
is boat, which
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nearly
6
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
percent
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
visitors
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
used
it.

Overall
, we can
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
see
car is the commonest
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
transport
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
visitors
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
used
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
but
the total
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
show
we
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
see
that public
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
transport
is more popular than private
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transport
,
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nearly
86
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percent
and
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nearly
70
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
percent
.

IELTS academic The bar chart gives information of transport international visitors used during their visit to New Zealand.

Academic
  American English
3 paragraphs
111 words
This writing has been penalized,
text can't be
less than 250 words in Task 2
and less than 150 words in Task 1
4.0
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 6.5
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • ?
    Include an introduction and conclusion
  • ?
    Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • ?
    Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.5
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.5
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 5.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • ?
    Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
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