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the bar chart depicts the information about the value of the Nations export in five different goods during 2015 and 2016 and the tabular chart represents the proportion change in each things of export in both years

the bar chart depicts the information about the value of the Nations export in five different goods during 2015 and 2016 and the tabular chart represents the proportion change in each things of export in both years pKKE9
Overall, it is vivid that the highest number of export were earning from petroleum product and engineering products. whereas, the least proportion change value gems and jewellery over a period of time. Having a cursory glance on chart. it shows that in 2015 billions dollar were got from petroleum products. however, it increased slightly at 63 billions dollar in 2016. Moreover, 55 billions dollar were gained from engineering goods that noticed increased at 60 billion dollar in next year. furthermore, in 2015 and 2016, almost 40 billions dollar from Gems and Jewellery. whilst, it remained same at thirty billions dollar were obtained from agriculture products. moving ahead, from textiles, nearly 15% billions dollar attained in 2015. But it uplifted at 30 billions dollar in 2016. After analysing meaning data, it is clear that in 2015 and 2016, 3% value changed in petroleum products. But 85% value changed in engineering products in 2015 and 2016. however, in gemes and jewellery 5. 80% value changed. moving further, 0. 81 per cent value has been changed in agriculture goods in both given period. while, 15. 24 present value changed in textile in same years.
Overall
, it is vivid that the highest number of export were earning from petroleum
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
product
and engineering
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
products
.
This sentence does not start with an uppercase letter
whereas
, the least proportion
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
change
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
value
gems and
Possible spelling mistake. 'jewellery' is British English.
jewellery
over a period of time. Having a cursory glance on chart.
This sentence does not start with an uppercase letter
it
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
shows
that in 2015
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
billions
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
dollar
were
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
got
from petroleum
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
products
.
This sentence does not start with an uppercase letter
however
, it increased
slightly
at 63
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
billions
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
dollar
in 2016.
Moreover
, 55
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
billions
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
dollar
were gained
from engineering
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
goods
that noticed increased at 60
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
billion
Possible agreement error. The noun 'dollar' seems to be countable, so consider using: "dollars".
dollar
in
next
year.
This sentence does not start with an uppercase letter
furthermore
, in 2015 and 2016, almost 40
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
billions
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
dollar
from Gems and
Possible spelling mistake. 'Jewellery' is British English.
Jewellery
.
This sentence does not start with an uppercase letter
whilst
, it remained same at thirty
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
billions
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
dollar
were obtained
from agriculture
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
products
.
This sentence does not start with an uppercase letter
moving
ahead, from textiles,
nearly
15%
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
billions
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
dollar
attained in 2015.
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
But
it uplifted at 30
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
billions
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
dollar
in 2016. After
Possible spelling mistake. 'analysing' is British English.
analysing
meaning data, it is
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
clear
that in 2015 and 2016, 3%
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
value
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
changed
in petroleum
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
products
.
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
But
85%
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
value
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
changed
in engineering
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
products
in 2015 and 2016.
This sentence does not start with an uppercase letter
however
, in
Possible spelling mistake. Did you mean "gems", the plural form of the noun 'gem'?
gemes
and
Possible spelling mistake. 'jewellery' is British English.
jewellery
5. 80%
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
value
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
changed
.
This sentence does not start with an uppercase letter
moving
further
, 0. 81 per cent
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
value
has been
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
changed
in agriculture
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
goods
in both
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
given
period.
This sentence does not start with an uppercase letter
while
, 15. 24 present
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
value
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
changed
in textile in same years.
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IELTS academic the bar chart depicts the information about the value of the Nations export in five different goods during 2015 and 2016 and the tabular chart represents the proportion change in each things of export in both years

Academic
  American English
1 paragraphs
191 words
5.5
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 5.5
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • ?
    Include an introduction and conclusion
  • ?
    Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • ?
    Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.0
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.5
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 5.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • ?
    Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
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