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THE BAR CHART BELOW SHOWS THE SECTOR CONTRIBUTES TO INDIA'S GROSS DOMESTIV PRODUCT FROM 1960 TO 2000

THE BAR CHART BELOW SHOWS THE SECTOR CONTRIBUTES TO INDIA'S GROSS DOMESTIV PRODUCT FROM 1960 TO 2000 3YnYN
THE BAR GRAPH ILLUSTRATES THE COMPONENTS CONTRIBUTIONS TO INDIA'S GDP FROM 1960 TO 2000. THE THREE SECTORS ARE AGRICULTURE, INDUSTRY AND SERSERVICES SECTOR. IT IS VIVEDLY SEEN FROM THE CHART THAT IN THE YEAR 1960, THE AMOUNT OF GDP IN AGRICULTURE WAS 60 AND THE AMOUNT OF GDP IN BOTH SECTORS INDUSTRY OR SERVICE SECTOR WAS ALMOST SAME NEAR ABOUT 15 IN THE SAME YEAR IT WAS 45 LESS AS COMPARED TO AGRICULTURE SECTOR. ALSO, IN THE YEAR 1970, THE PROPORTION OF GDP IN INDUSTRY AND SERVICE SECTORS WAS APPROXIMATELY 22 AND IT WAS 32 LESS THAN THE PROPORTION OF GDP IN AUCULTURE SECTOR WHICH WAS 54. AFTER THAT, IN THE YEAR 1980; THE RATE OF GDP IN AGRICULTURE SECTOR WAS DECLINED AND BECOME 45 BUT THE GDP IN INDUSTRY OR SERVICES SECTOR WAS CONSTANTLY SAME NEAR ABOUT 22. FURTHERMORE, IN THE YEAR 1990, THE GDP IN AGRICULTURE SECTOR AGAIN DECLINED AND BECAME 30 THAN THE GDP OF SERVICE SECTOR AREOSED SUDDENLY APPROXIMATELY 45. IT WAS 10 MORE THAN THE GDP OF AGRICULTURE SECTOR. AT LAST, IN THE YEAR 2000, THE SERVICE SECTOR GDP WAS 62 AND IT REACHED AT PEAK POINT AND THE AMOUNT OF GDP IN AGRICULTURE SECTOR DECLINED AND BECAME 15 THE GDP OF SERVICE SECTOR WAS 43 MORE AS COMPARED TO GDP OF AGRICULTURE SECTOROVERALL, THE BAR GRAPH SHOWED MANY FLUCTUATIONS BUT THE HIGHEST NUMBER OF GDP WAS SEEN IN THE AGRICULTURE OR SERVICE SECTOR AND LOWEST GDP WAS RECORDED IN INDUSTRY SECTOR
THE BAR GRAPH ILLUSTRATES THE COMPONENTS CONTRIBUTIONS TO INDIA'S GDP FROM 1960 TO 2000. THE THREE
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SECTORS
ARE
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AGRICULTURE
,
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INDUSTRY
AND
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SERSERVICES
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SECTOR
. IT IS
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VIVEDLY
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SEEN
FROM THE CHART THAT IN THE
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YEAR
1960, THE AMOUNT OF GDP IN
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AGRICULTURE
WAS 60 AND THE AMOUNT OF GDP IN BOTH
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SECTORS
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INDUSTRY
OR
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SERVICE
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SECTOR
WAS ALMOST SAME NEAR ABOUT 15 IN THE SAME
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YEAR
IT WAS 45 LESS
Comparison requires "than", not 'then' nor 'as'.
AS
COMPARED TO
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AGRICULTURE
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SECTOR
.
ALSO
, IN THE
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YEAR
1970, THE PROPORTION OF GDP IN
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INDUSTRY
AND
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SERVICE
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SECTORS
WAS APPROXIMATELY 22 AND IT WAS 32 LESS THAN THE PROPORTION OF GDP IN
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AUCULTURE
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SECTOR
WHICH WAS 54. AFTER THAT, IN THE
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YEAR
1980; THE RATE OF GDP IN
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AGRICULTURE
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SECTOR
WAS DECLINED
AND BECOME 45
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BUT
THE GDP IN
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INDUSTRY
OR
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SERVICES
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SECTOR
WAS
CONSTANTLY
SAME NEAR ABOUT 22.
FURTHERMORE
, IN THE
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YEAR
1990, THE GDP IN
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AGRICULTURE
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SECTOR
AGAIN DECLINED AND BECAME 30 THAN THE GDP OF
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SERVICE
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SECTOR
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AREOSED
SUDDENLY
APPROXIMATELY 45. IT WAS 10 MORE THAN THE GDP OF
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AGRICULTURE
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SECTOR
. AT LAST, IN THE
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YEAR
2000, THE
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SERVICE
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SECTOR
GDP WAS 62 AND IT REACHED AT PEAK POINT AND THE AMOUNT OF GDP IN
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AGRICULTURE
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SECTOR
DECLINED AND BECAME 15 THE GDP OF
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SERVICE
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SECTOR
WAS 43 MORE
Comparison requires "than", not 'then' nor 'as'.
AS
COMPARED TO GDP OF
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AGRICULTURE
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SECTOROVERALL
, THE BAR GRAPH
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SHOWED
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MANY
FLUCTUATIONS
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BUT
THE HIGHEST NUMBER OF GDP WAS
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SEEN
IN THE
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AGRICULTURE
OR
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SERVICE
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SECTOR
AND LOWEST GDP
WAS RECORDED
IN
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INDUSTRY
Please add a punctuation mark at the end of paragraph
SECTOR
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IELTS academic THE BAR CHART BELOW SHOWS THE SECTOR CONTRIBUTES TO INDIA'S GROSS DOMESTIV PRODUCT FROM 1960 TO 2000

Academic
  American English
1 paragraphs
246 words
5.5
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 5.5
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