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how many hours the employees of a certain financial company spend per year on trainings

how many hours the employees of a certain financial company spend per year on trainings 8go2B
The pie chart shows how many hours the employees of a certain financial company spend per year on trainings. The second chart describes how office workers — managers and secretaries — feel about the trainings. The employees are provided 60 hours of different trainings per year, half of the hours being spent on technical trainings. The other 30 hours are divided between career development coaching, interpersonal skills practice, and health and safety instruction. Of these three types of training, career development coaching is spent the most time on — company workers have 15 hours of such education annually. On the second place after career development is interpersonal skills practice — it takes up as much as 10 hours per year. The last item on this list is health and safety instruction— the workers spend a mere 5 hours per year on it. In general, the attitude to the trainings is positive. The overwhelming majority of the respondents think that the trainings are important for their job. More than 70 percent of the managers say that the trainings provide them with knowledge that is instrumental in their being able to perform their duties. An even greater share of the secretaries — almost 90 percent — report that the information that they learn at such training sessions is invaluable for their job performance.
The pie chart
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shows
how
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many
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hours
the employees of a certain financial
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company
spend per
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year
on
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trainings
. The second chart
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
describes
how office workers — managers and secretaries — feel about the trainings.

Three successive sentences begin with the same word. Consider rewording the sentence or use a thesaurus to find a synonym.
The
employees
are provided
60
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
hours
of
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
different
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
trainings
per
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
year
, half of the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
hours
being spent
on technical
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
trainings
.
Three successive sentences begin with the same word. Consider rewording the sentence or use a thesaurus to find a synonym.
The
other 30
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hours
are divided
between career development coaching, interpersonal
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
skills
practice, and health and safety instruction. Of these three types of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
training
, career development coaching
is spent
the most time on —
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
company
workers have 15
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hours
of such education
annually
. On the second place after career development is interpersonal
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skills
practice — it takes up as much as 10
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
hours
per
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
year
. The last item on this list is health and safety instruction— the workers spend a mere 5
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
hours
per
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
year
on it.

In general
, the attitude to the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
trainings
is
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
positive
. The overwhelming majority of the respondents
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
think
that the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
trainings
are
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
important
for their job. More than 70 percent of the managers say that the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
trainings
provide them with knowledge
that is
instrumental in their being able to perform their duties. An even greater share of the secretaries — almost 90 percent — report that the information that they learn at such
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
training
sessions is invaluable for their job performance.
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IELTS academic how many hours the employees of a certain financial company spend per year on trainings

Academic
  American English
3 paragraphs
221 words
6.0
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 7.0
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • ?
    Include an introduction and conclusion
  • ?
    Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • ?
    Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.5
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.5
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 5.5
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • ?
    Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
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    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
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