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the bar chart about public transport by train tram and buses from 2012 t0 2015

the bar chart about public transport by train tram and buses from 2012 t0 2015 kgeYW
The chart illustrates the various amount of passengers how facilitated their transport (public) requirements which are using tram, bus and train in the period from 2012 to 2015 at somewhere town. Overall, the majority of passengers who are using tram was increased progressively and become the most popular method of transport. However, the number of people had used trains dropped over the period and otherwise, it was showed regained by the end of the period. Bus usage fluctuated but it is acquired popular. The number of passengers who are used train began at around 76000 in 2012, it become declined rapidly in the next year, approximately 10000 passengers. By 2015, that was recovered to nearly 54000 passengers. Bus passengers has showed similar amount and by the 2012, it is about 53000 although following year to approximately 45000 and that year minimum passengers of usage of the bus. In 2014 and 2015 there was no huge gap difference between of the bus passengers and by the 2015, it is about 53000. Train was the popular method in the beginning and it was nearly 78000 by the 2012. Apart from that in 2013, it showed lowest statics due to the period and It was just 15000 (2013). After following years it securing gradual amount and end of the period it has approximately 55000. All in all, the tram in the beginning was the lowest passengers with having about 23000 and end of the period it become most popular form among the passengers with about 95000.
The chart illustrates the various amount of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
passengers
how facilitated their transport (public)

requirements which are using tram, bus and
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
train
in the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
period
from 2012 to 2015 at somewhere town.

Overall
, the majority of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
passengers
who are using tram
was increased
progressively
and become the

most popular method of transport.
However
, the number of
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
people
had
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
used
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
trains
dropped over the

period and
otherwise
, it was
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
showed
regained by the
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
end
of the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
period
. Bus usage fluctuated
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
but
it
is acquired
popular.

The number of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
passengers
who are
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
used
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
train
began at around 76000 in 2012, it
Did you mean "becomes"?
become
declined

rapidly
in the
next
year, approximately 10000
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
passengers
. By 2015, that
was recovered
to
nearly
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
54000 passengers
. Bus
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
passengers
has
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
showed
similar amount and by the 2012, it is about 53000 although

following year to approximately 45000 and that year minimum
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
passengers
of usage of the bus. In 2014

and 2015 there was no huge gap difference between of the bus
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
passengers
and by the 2015, it is about

53000.
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
Train
was the popular method in the beginning and it was
nearly
78000 by the 2012. Apart from

that in 2013, it
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
showed
A determiner is probably missing here: "the lowest".
lowest
statics due to the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
period
and It was
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
just
15000 (2013). After following

years
Did you mean "it's securing", "it is securing", or "it was securing"?
it securing
gradual amount and
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
end
of the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
period
it has approximately 55000.

All in all, the tram in the beginning was the lowest
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
passengers
with having about 23000 and
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
end
of the

period it
Did you mean "becomes"?
become
most popular form among the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
passengers
with about 95000.
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IELTS academic the bar chart about public transport by train tram and buses from 2012 t0 2015

Academic
  American English
4 paragraphs
253 words
6.0
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 7.0
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • ?
    Include an introduction and conclusion
  • ?
    Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • ?
    Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.5
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.5
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 5.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • ?
    Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
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