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Task 1- British people giving money to the charities

Task 1- British people giving money to the charities oRNaD
This bart chart shows us the percentage of Biritish people from 18 to older than 65 years old who give money to charities in two different years(1990, 2010). Overal, we can see that people between the ages of 36 to 50 in 1990 have the highest proportion, however the youngest group in the chart in 2010 have the lowest percentage. The percentage of these people grows between the ages 18 to 50 from 15% to 42% in 1990, although the percentage of people from 51 to older ages decreases from 35% 20 approximatley 30% in this year. In 2010, the average of people giving money to the charity is less than 1990, but in totall there is a increase in percentage from 5% to about 45% from the youngest groep to the ages 65. What really attracs my attention is the 10% percentage decrease from the ages 65 to older ages.
This
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bart
chart
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shows
us the
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percentage
of
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Biritish
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people
from 18 to older than 65 years
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old
who give money to charities in two
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different
years(1990, 2010).

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Overal
, we can
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see
that
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people
between the
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ages
of 36 to 50 in 1990 have the highest proportion,
however
the youngest group in the chart in 2010 have the lowest percentage.

The
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percentage
of these
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people
grows between the
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ages
18 to 50 from 15% to 42% in 1990, although the
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percentage
of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
from 51 to older
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ages
decreases from 35% 20
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approximatley
30% in this year.

In 2010, the average of
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people
giving money to the charity is less than 1990,
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but
in
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totall
there is
Use "an" instead of 'a' if the following word starts with a vowel sound, e.g. 'an article', 'an hour'
a
increase in
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percentage
from 5% to about 45% from the youngest
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groep
to the
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ages
65. What
really
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attracs
my attention is the 10%
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
percentage
decrease from the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
ages
65 to older
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
ages
.

IELTS academic Task 1- British people giving money to the charities

Academic
  American English
4 paragraphs
151 words
5.0
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 6.5
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • ?
    Include an introduction and conclusion
  • ?
    Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • ?
    Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.0
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.0
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 5.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • ?
    Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
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    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
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