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Talk about your favorite activity near or in water

Talk about your favorite activity near or in water NwXry
I’d take this opportunity to talk about Beach Volleyball, it is so a mind-blowing sport that is popular across the world. To prepare for this activity, I need a volleyball, two poles, and a net. Apart from this, I require 8-10 people who can play with me. Apart from this, some tricks are required to play the game well. Besides, as you know, Beach volleyball is played on the sand where movements will become slower and vertical jump height will become shorter. Sand can be difficult to move on, which can cause you to become tired more easily. So, it’s not as easy as it looks. The primary reason for trying this activity is to do something out of the box. Though I have played many sports, unusually playing the usual sports is an altogether new experience.
I’d take this opportunity to talk about Beach Volleyball, it is
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
so
a mind-blowing sport
that is
popular across the world. To prepare for this activity, I need a volleyball, two poles, and a net. Apart from this, I require 8-10
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
people
who can play with me. Apart from this,
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
tricks
are required
to play the game well.
Besides
, as you know, Beach volleyball
is played
on the sand where movements will become slower and vertical jump height will become shorter. Sand can be difficult to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
move
on, which can cause you to become tired more
easily
.
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
So
, it’s not as easy as it looks. The primary reason for trying this activity is to do something out of the box. Though I have played
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
many
sports,
unusually
playing the usual sports is an altogether new experience.
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IELTS academic Talk about your favorite activity near or in water

Academic
  American English
1 paragraphs
137 words
This writing has been penalized,
text can't be
less than 250 words in Task 2
and less than 150 words in Task 1
5.0
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 5.5
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • ?
    Include an introduction and conclusion
  • ?
    Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • ?
    Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 6.5
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.5
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 7.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • ?
    Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
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    Currently is not available
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  • Doesn't meet the criteria
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