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Pie charts show units of electricity production

Pie charts show units of electricity production JVxRD
The pie charts show that how the figure for units of electricity by fuel source changed in 1980 and 2000. The electricity by coal was the largest, at 50 units in Australia. The number of sources in coal of electricity production increase sharply from 50 units in 1980 to 130 units in 2000. The usage amount of Hydro power showed a steady increase, raised with being 36units. In contrast, using of Oil and Natural Gas were an opposite trend. The electricity by Oil and Natural Gas were almost the same to fall to 2 units in 2000. The electricity production percentage on Coal and Natural Gas in France were the largest in 1980, at 25 units. The usage amount of Nuclear Power ranked the number two in 1980 but the ranking improved to number one in 2000, at 125 units. While, the production by Natural Gas and Hydro Power were fallen to 2 units in 2000. Overall, two countries choice different main fuel source respectively in 2000. Australia mainly uses Coal and France mainly uses Nuclear Power.
The pie charts
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show
that how the figure for
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units
of
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electricity
by fuel source
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
changed
in 1980 and 2000.

The
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electricity
by coal was the largest, at 50
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units
in Australia.
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The
number of sources in coal of
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electricity
production increase
sharply
from 50
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units
in 1980 to 130
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
units
in 2000.
Three successive sentences begin with the same word. Consider rewording the sentence or use a thesaurus to find a synonym.
The
usage amount of Hydro
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power
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showed
a steady increase, raised with being
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36units
.
In contrast
, using of Oil and
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Natural
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
Gas
were an opposite trend. The
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electricity
by Oil and
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Natural
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
Gas
were almost the same to fall to 2
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units
in 2000.

The
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electricity
production percentage on Coal and
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Natural
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
Gas
in France were the largest in 1980, at 25
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units
.
Three successive sentences begin with the same word. Consider rewording the sentence or use a thesaurus to find a synonym.
The
usage amount of Nuclear
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Power
ranked the number two in 1980
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but
the ranking
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improved
to number one in 2000, at 125
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units
. While, the production by
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Natural
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
Gas
and Hydro
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Power
were fallen
to 2
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units
in 2000.

Overall
, two countries choice
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different
main fuel source
respectively
in 2000. Australia
mainly
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uses
Coal and France
mainly
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
uses
Nuclear
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
Power
.
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IELTS academic Pie charts show units of electricity production

Academic
  American English
4 paragraphs
177 words
6.0
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 7.0
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
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    One main idea per paragraph
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    Include an introduction and conclusion
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    Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
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    Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.5
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.5
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 5.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • ?
    Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
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