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The double line graph provides

The double line graph provides AJAXM
The double line graph provides /compares/  rates of smoking men and women,  per 1000 people, in China, between the years 1960 and 2000. In the year 1960,  the number of smoking women was at point 100, whereas the number of smoking men was 6 times more. In the next years, we can see the interesting tendency off less smoking man and more smoking woman. In 1965 to 1970 years the number of smoking woman doubled to the point of 200 and in the same period the number of smoking man remained declaining. Approximetly, in the year of 1975 we observe the significant growth of smoking woman to the number of 300, while the number of smoking man continues to dicrease to the number of 500. During the next period, the double line graph shows downward trend in the both gender. In 1990 the number of smoking man reduced to the point of 400 and the number of smoking woman to the point of 300 respectably. According to the double line graph we can observe that the number of smoking man and woman almost equaled in the year of 2000, in the number of just under 300. Consequently, we can constant that the number of smokers in China reduces from year to year.
The double line graph provides /compares/
Possible typo: you repeated a whitespace
 
rates of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
smoking
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
men
and women,
Possible typo: you repeated a whitespace
 
per 1000
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
people
, in China, between the years 1960 and 2000. In the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
year 1960
,
Possible typo: you repeated a whitespace
 
the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
number
of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
smoking
women was at
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
point
100, whereas the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
number
of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
smoking
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
men
was 6 times more. In the
next
years, we can
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
see
the interesting tendency off less
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
smoking
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
man
and more
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
smoking
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
woman
.
Three successive sentences begin with the same word. Consider rewording the sentence or use a thesaurus to find a synonym.
In
1965 to 1970 years the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
number
of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
smoking
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
woman
doubled to the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
point
of 200 and in the same period the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
number
of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
smoking
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
man
remained
Possible spelling mistake found.
declaining
.
Possible spelling mistake found.
Approximetly
, in the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
year
of 1975 we observe the significant growth of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
smoking
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
woman
to the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
number
of 300, while the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
number
of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
smoking
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
man
continues to
Possible spelling mistake found.
dicrease
to the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
number
of 500. During the
next
period, the double line graph
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
shows
downward trend in the both gender. In 1990 the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
number
of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
smoking
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
man
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
reduced
to the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
point
of 400 and the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
number
of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
smoking
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
woman
to the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
point
of 300
respectably
. According to the double line graph we can observe that the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
number
of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
smoking
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
man
and
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
woman
almost equaled in the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
year
of 2000, in the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
number
of
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
just
under 300.
Consequently
, we
The word 'constant' is a noun or an adjective. A verb or adverb is missing or misspelled here, or maybe a comma is missing.
can constant
that the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
number
of smokers in China
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
reduces
from
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
year
to
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
year
.
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IELTS academic The double line graph provides

Academic
  American English
1 paragraphs
210 words
5.5
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 5.5
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • ?
    Include an introduction and conclusion
  • ?
    Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • ?
    Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.0
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.0
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 5.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • ?
    Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
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