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number of athletes in olympic

number of athletes in olympic 06k79
The chart provides information about the number of men and women participating in Olympics over a 88-year period between 1924 in 2012. Another graph witnessed how many people joined in the game in the same period. Overall, it can be seen that the both charts had a noticeable increase in number of athletes. The figure is given in thousands. The number of athletes compared with the gender had risen noticeably from just 3 to below 6 from 1924 to 2012. There was a marked increase in the number of female from just above 0 to just below 5, while it had a significant increase in the number of men from exactly 3 to below 6. The another graph had a dramatic incline in the number of people participating between 1924 to 2012. Almost the century, it had increased steadily from below 4 to just over 6. Then, the number of participants increased considerably from above 6 to more than 10 from 1984 to 2012.
The chart provides information about the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
number
of
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
men
and women participating in Olympics over
Use "an" instead of 'a' if the following word starts with a vowel sound, e.g. 'an article', 'an hour'
a
88-year period between 1924 in 2012. Another graph witnessed how
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
many
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
people
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
joined
in the game in the same period.
Overall
, it can be
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
seen
that the both charts had a noticeable increase in
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number
of athletes. The figure is
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
given
in thousands.

The
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
number
of athletes compared with the gender had risen
noticeably
from
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
just
3 to
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below
6 from 1924 to 2012. There was a marked increase in the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
number
of female from
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
just
above 0 to
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
just
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
below
5, while it had a significant increase in the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
number
of
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
men
from exactly 3 to
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
below
6.

The another graph had a dramatic incline in the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
number
of
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
people
participating
Use "between" + "and" not "to." Try this: "between 1924 and 2012".
between 1924 to 2012
. Almost the century, it had increased
steadily
from
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
below
4 to
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
just
over 6. Then, the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
number
of participants increased
considerably
from above 6 to more than 10 from 1984 to 2012.
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IELTS academic number of athletes in olympic

Academic
  American English
3 paragraphs
164 words
6.0
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 6.5
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • ?
    Include an introduction and conclusion
  • ?
    Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • ?
    Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.5
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.5
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 5.5
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • ?
    Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
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