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Nokia, Samsung, And others.

Nokia, Samsung, And others. GrkRx
This bar graph compares the number of products sold globally by Samsung, Apple, Nokia, LG, and ZTE, the sales of each brand are given for the years 2009, 2011, and 2013. Overall, most companies saw an increase in sales along the period with the exception of Nokia and LG. Samsung was the best seller by the end of the interval and Nokia came in second and despite a major drop in sales. Samsung's sales has doubled over the period from about 225 in 2009 to 450 in 2013. Apple also saw a growth but no as significant, their sales were around 25 in 2009 and jumped to 150 in 2013. ZTE, on the other hand, saw a very minor increase, starting at 50 sales in 2009 and ending at approximately 70 in 2013. Nokia took a huge loss in sales over the years, and while the initial drop from 2009 to 2011 was small, the sales almost halved from 2011 to 2013 as they dropped from around 425 to 250. The other company that faced a loss is LG, their sales dropped from about 125 in 2009 to about 75 in 2013.
This bar graph compares the number of products sold globally by Samsung, Apple, Nokia, LG, and
Possible spelling mistake found.
ZTE
, the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
sales
of each brand are
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
given
for the years 2009, 2011, and 2013.

Overall
, most
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
companies
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
saw
an increase in
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
sales
along the period
Consider using "except" or "except for"
with the exception of
Nokia and LG. Samsung was the
This word is normally spelled as one.
best seller
by the
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
end
of the interval and Nokia came in second and despite a major drop in sales.

Samsung's
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
sales
has doubled over the period from about 225 in 2009 to 450 in 2013. Apple
also
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
saw
a growth
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
but
Did you mean "now" (=at this moment) instead of 'no' (negation)?
no
as significant, their
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
sales
were around 25 in 2009 and jumped to 150 in 2013.
Possible spelling mistake found.
ZTE
,
on the other hand
,
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
saw
a
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
very
minor increase, starting at 50
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
sales
in 2009 and ending at approximately 70 in 2013.

Nokia took a huge loss in
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
sales
over the years, and while the initial drop from 2009 to 2011 was
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
small
, the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
sales
almost halved from 2011 to 2013 as they dropped from around 425 to 250. The other
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
company
that faced a loss is LG, their
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
sales
dropped from about 125 in 2009 to about 75 in 2013.
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IELTS academic Nokia, Samsung, And others.

Academic
  American English
4 paragraphs
192 words
6.0
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 7.0
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    Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.0
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  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.5
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 5.0
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    Present relevant ideas
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    Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
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