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Kisi Se pie chart the percentage of female graduates of certain University

Kisi Se pie chart the percentage of female graduates of certain University 960g0
The given pie chart highlights the comparative study of the percentage of female graduates of Aberforth University. Overall, there are five fields mentions between 1990 and 2015. The maximum percentage of education and the minority figure of Engineering field. At the first glance, it can be seen from the Pie Chart that in 1990, the higher percentage of education which was about 40% as opposed to minority amount of Engineering and Management approximately 5% and 10%, while a quarter of the percentage of the art fields and less than 5% of medicine. It can be seen from the Pie Chart that, the percentage of Management was risen 10% in 2015 and dramatically went down the amount of education about 25%. whereas, 15% of Engineering in 2015 as compared to merely 5% in 1990. The percentage of art was sharply went town about 15% in 2015 and a quarter of medicine field.
The
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
given
pie chart highlights the comparative study of the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
percentage
of female graduates of
Possible spelling mistake found.
Aberforth
University.

Overall
, there are five fields mentions between 1990 and 2015. The maximum
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
percentage
of education and the minority figure of Engineering field.

At the
first
glance, it can be
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
seen
from the Pie Chart that in 1990, the higher
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
percentage
of education which was about 40% as opposed to minority amount of Engineering and Management approximately 5% and 10%, while a quarter of the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
percentage
of the art fields and less than 5% of medicine.

It can be
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
seen
from the Pie Chart that, the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
percentage
of Management
was risen
10% in 2015 and
dramatically
went down the amount of education about 25%.
This sentence does not start with an uppercase letter
whereas
, 15% of Engineering in 2015 as compared to
merely
5% in 1990. The
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
percentage
of art was
sharply
Consider using a past participle here: "gone".
went
town about 15% in 2015 and a quarter of medicine field.
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IELTS academic Kisi Se pie chart the percentage of female graduates of certain University

Academic
  American English
4 paragraphs
151 words
6.0
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 7.0
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
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    One main idea per paragraph
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    Include an introduction and conclusion
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    Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
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    Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 6.0
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.5
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 5.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • ?
    Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
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