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In some countries, the government imposes a special tax on foods that are shown to cause health problems. This kind of government oversight is a limitation on people’s freedom and should be removed. To what extent do you agree or disagree with this opinion.

In some countries, the government imposes a special tax on foods that are shown to cause health problems. This kind of government oversight is a limitation on people’s freedom and should be removed. with this opinion. aVXoY
In some areas of the world, the leader negotiates a special tax on foodstuffs that are explain to cause health issues. I am deeply agree that this kind of government oversight is a limitation on people freedom and should be extruded. The first reason, there are so many poor around the world, they are inability to pay for a big amount of money, even that they do not have money for their meal so it is impossible to spent money for the tax. Namely, people in some countries in Asian are face up with the starvation and they really need some help. Next, the second why people do not need to pay for the special tax that nowadays the problem of the bribe is such a big deal. The population is increasing more and more, so some people have the bad behavior and attitude in politics maybe get the revenue for the illicitly purpose. Many people in their country are fighting to remove the bad people like that. The last reason is human's freedom. They really need to be freedom, how they treat with themself the best way to improve their live quality. Finally, people really deserve to have a best treatment from the government not only for the people life but is the quality of the country.
In
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
areas of the world, the leader negotiates a special tax on foodstuffs that are
Consider using a past participle here: "explained".
explain
to cause health issues. I am
deeply
Consider using a past participle here: "agreed".
agree
that this kind of
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
government
oversight is a limitation on
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
freedom and should
be extruded
.

The
first
reason, there are
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
so
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
many
poor around the world, they are inability to pay for a
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
big
amount of money, even that they do not have money for their meal
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
so
it is impossible to spent money for the tax.
Namely
,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
in
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
countries in Asian are face up with the
Use a comma before 'and' if it connects two independent clauses (unless they are closely connected and short).
starvation and
they
really
need
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
help
.
Next
, the second why
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
do not need to pay for the special tax that nowadays the problem of the bribe is such a
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
big
deal. The population is increasing more and more,
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
so
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
have the
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
bad
behavior and attitude in politics maybe
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
get
the revenue for the
illicitly
purpose.
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
Many
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
in their country are fighting to remove the
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
bad
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
like that. The last reason is human's freedom. They
really
need to be freedom, how they treat with
The term is non-standard and not widely accepted.
themself
the best way to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
improve
their
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
live
quality.

Finally
,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
really
deserve to have
Use "the" with the superlative.
a
best treatment from the
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
government
not
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
only
for the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
life
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
but
is the quality of the country.
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IELTS academic In some countries, the government imposes a special tax on foods that are shown to cause health problems. This kind of government oversight is a limitation on people’s freedom and should be removed. with this opinion.

Academic
  American English
3 paragraphs
218 words
6.0
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 7.0
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • ?
    Include an introduction and conclusion
  • ?
    Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • ?
    Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 6.0
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.5
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 5.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • ?
    Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
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