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In about 150 words, write a paragraph about the benefits of playing sports.

In about 150 words, write a paragraph about the benefits of playing sports. Awpjl
Playing sports can result in many benefits. Firstly, playing sports can give you a healthy life and a fit body. You will be more active and healthier by playing sports. To illustrate, you can have a lower chance of getting a serious illness such as a heart attack or high blood pressure. In other words, it increases your resistance to illness. Furthermore, there are some sports which you can play easily such as table tennis, tennis or football and after that, you feel completely relaxed or even free from your stress. Moreover, playing sports, especially some outside activities helps to decrease the wasted time that you spend sitting in front of computers or watching television. These sports can help you have endurance, quickness and even teach you how to improve team spirit and work in groups. In sum, playing sports is very advantageous.
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
Playing
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
sports
can result in
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
many
benefits.
Firstly
,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
playing
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
sports
can give you a healthy life and a fit body. You will be more active and healthier by
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
playing
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
sports
. To illustrate, you can have a lower chance of getting a serious illness such as a heart attack or high blood pressure.
In other words
, it increases your resistance to illness.
Furthermore
, there are
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
sports
which you can play
easily
such as table tennis, tennis or football and after that, you feel completely relaxed or even free from your
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
stress
.
Moreover
,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
playing
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
sports
,
especially
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
outside activities
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
helps
to decrease the wasted time that you spend sitting in front of computers or watching television. These
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
sports
can
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
help
you have endurance, quickness and even teach you how to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
improve
team spirit and work in groups. In sum,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
playing
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
sports
is
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
very
advantageous.

IELTS academic In about 150 words, write a paragraph about the benefits of playing sports.

Academic
  American English
1 paragraphs
143 words
This writing has been penalized,
text can't be
less than 250 words in Task 2
and less than 150 words in Task 1
4.0
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 5.5
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • ?
    Include an introduction and conclusion
  • ?
    Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • ?
    Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.5
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.0
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 7.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • ?
    Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
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