Do you want to improve your writing? Try our new evaluation service and get detailed feedback.
Check Your Text it's free

http://testbig.com/ielts-writing-task-i-ielts-academic-essays/chart-below-shows-annual-number-rentals-and-sales

http: //testbig. com/ielts-writing-task-i-ielts-academic-essays/chart-below-shows-annual-number-rentals-and-sales MB9kL
The bar chart provides detailed information about how many rentals and sales in three different films over a decade from 2002 to 2011. Looking more closely from the graph, it is obvious from the data that the number of DVD and Blu-ray sales was an upward trend, while others were the opposite. According to the chart, the sales of the DVD was 45000 at the beginning. Over the following five years, the DVD was sold to be three times more and crossed over 210000 in 2007. Then, the trend changed to a downward trend, and the DVD's sales declined 31000 from the peak in sales to 180000 by the end of the period. For Blu-ray, it was sold first time in 2007 at below 10000, but its sales increased significantly to approximately 15000 in 2011. With regard to rentals and VHS's sales, both of them have a steady decrease over the period. The number of film rentals and the sales of VHS in 2002 was 185000 and 85000 respectively. By the end of this period, film rentals a year left only 55000, while VHS could have not sold its film since 2006.
The bar chart provides detailed information about how
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
many
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
rentals
and
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
sales
in three
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
different
films
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
over
a decade from 2002 to 2011.

Looking more
closely
from the graph, it is obvious from the data that the number of DVD and Blu-ray
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
sales
was an upward trend, while others were the opposite.

According to the chart, the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
sales
of the DVD was 45000 at the beginning.
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
Over
the following five years, the DVD
was sold
to be three times more and crossed
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
over
210000 in 2007. Then, the trend
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
changed
to a downward trend, and the DVD's
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
sales
declined 31000 from the peak in
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
sales
to 180000 by the
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
end
of the period. For Blu-ray, it
was sold
first
time in 2007 at below 10000,
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
but
its
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
sales
increased
significantly
to approximately 15000 in 2011.

With regard to
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
rentals
and VHS's
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
sales
, both of them have a steady decrease
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
over
the period. The number of film
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
rentals
and the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
sales
of VHS in 2002 was 185000 and 85000
respectively
. By the
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
end
of this period, film
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
rentals
a year
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
left
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
only
55000, while VHS could have not sold its film since 2006.

IELTS academic http: //testbig. com/ielts-writing-task-i-ielts-academic-essays/chart-below-shows-annual-number-rentals-and-sales

Academic
  American English
4 paragraphs
192 words
6.0
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 6.5
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • ?
    Include an introduction and conclusion
  • ?
    Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • ?
    Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.5
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.5
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 7.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • ?
    Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
  • ?
    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
Recent posts





Get more results for topic:
  • http://testbig.com/ielts-writing-task-i-ielts-academic-essays/chart-below-shows-annual-number-rentals-and-sales