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how people aged between 25 and 34

how people aged between 25 and 34 RwMkQ
This bar chart provides information about percentage of homeowners and renters for people aged between 25 and 34 years old from 2004 to 2014. As can be seen in 2004, homeowners are reached to just under 60%, but renters has more less percentage against them with just 20%. The constant trend in next 4 years was accompanied with gradually increase for renters to approximately 25%. Obviously, the significant decrease starts from 2008 for homeowners, but the moderate increase is continued. Finally, can be said, the percentage for homeowners has considerable change from 60% to 35% and the increasing trend for renters is changed from 20% to just under 50% in this period. Overall, renters has increasing trend and in contrast the percentage of homeowners is dropped for people aged between 25 and 34 in the UK in 10 years.
This bar chart provides information about
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
percentage
of homeowners and
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
renters
for
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
people
aged between 25 and 34 years
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
old
from 2004 to 2014.

As can be
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
seen
in 2004, homeowners
are reached
to
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
just
under 60%,
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
but
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
renters
has
Use only "less" (without 'more') when you use the comparative.
more less
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
percentage
against them with
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
just
20%. The constant trend in
next
4 years was
The usual collocation for "accompany" is "by," not "with." It is better to say this: "accompanied by".
accompanied with
gradually
increase for
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
renters
to approximately 25%.
Obviously
, the significant decrease
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
starts
from 2008 for homeowners,
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
but
the moderate increase
is continued
.
Finally
, can
be said
, the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
percentage
for homeowners has considerable
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
change
from 60% to 35% and the increasing trend for
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
renters
is
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
changed
from 20% to
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
just
under 50% in this period.

Overall
,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
renters
has increasing trend and
in contrast
the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
percentage
of homeowners
is dropped
for
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
people
aged between 25 and 34 in the UK in 10 years.
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IELTS academic how people aged between 25 and 34

Academic
  American English
3 paragraphs
139 words
This writing has been penalized,
text can't be
less than 250 words in Task 2
and less than 150 words in Task 1
5.0
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 7.0
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • ?
    Include an introduction and conclusion
  • ?
    Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • ?
    Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.5
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.5
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 5.5
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • ?
    Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
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