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how many people aged in 25-34 are house in the UK

how many people aged in 25-34 are house in the UK nEPg2
The bar chart illustrates the information about accommodation of people aged 25-34 in the UK whether they own or rent a house during the 11 years from 2004. Overall, it is apparent that the percentage of homeowners had a considerably decreasing trend throughout these years. In contrast, the proportion of renters increased enormously. Looking at the chart more closely, one can see that the number of homeowners in the UK experienced a downward trend. In more detail, homeowners' proportion was about 58% in 2004 which was the highest rate over 11 years. From 2005 to 2008, the figure for homeowners fluctuated at average about 55% even though it Dipped marginally compared to the figure in 2004. Proceeding to the next period from 2008 to 2014, homeowners’ proportion continued to plunge. Also, the figure showed a dramatic decrease of approximately 43% in the year 2011 and remained virtually unchanged in 2012. At the end of the period, it continued to decline steadily. The percentage of renters witnessed an upward trend. In 2004, renters' proportion was quite modest, at around 20% which was only one-third of the number of homeowners in the UK. It increased to about 23% in 2005 and remained consistent in 2006. Noticeably, the UK roughly twofold from 23% to 48% over the 8 years. Nevertheless, the percentage of renters climbed as well, moving from about 20% to 48%, the gap between it and the homeowners included in the chart had widened at the end of the period.
The bar chart illustrates the information about accommodation of
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
people
aged 25-34 in the UK whether they
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
own
or rent a
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
house
during the 11 years from 2004.

Overall
, it is apparent that the percentage of homeowners had a
considerably
decreasing trend throughout these years.
In contrast
, the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
proportion
of renters increased
enormously
.

Looking at the chart more
closely
, one can
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
see
that the number of homeowners in the UK experienced a downward trend. In more detail, homeowners'
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
proportion
was about 58% in 2004 which was the highest rate over 11 years. From 2005 to 2008, the figure for homeowners fluctuated at average about 55%
even though
it Dipped
marginally
compared to the figure in 2004. Proceeding to the
next
period from 2008 to 2014, homeowners’
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
proportion
continued to plunge.
Also
, the figure
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
showed
a dramatic decrease of approximately 43% in the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
year
2011 and remained
virtually
unchanged in 2012. At the
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
end
of the period, it continued to decline
steadily
.

The percentage of renters witnessed an upward trend. In 2004, renters'
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
proportion
was quite modest, at around 20% which was
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
only
one-third of the number of homeowners in the UK. It increased to about 23% in 2005 and remained consistent in 2006.
Noticeably
, the UK roughly twofold from 23% to 48% over the 8 years.
Nevertheless
, the percentage of renters climbed
as well
, moving from about 20% to 48%, the gap between it and the homeowners included in the chart had widened at the
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
end
of the period.
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IELTS academic how many people aged in 25-34 are house in the UK

Academic
  American English
4 paragraphs
249 words
6.5
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 7.0
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • ?
    Include an introduction and conclusion
  • ?
    Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • ?
    Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 6.0
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.0
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 7.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • ?
    Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
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  • Meet the criteria
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