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How bees produce honey from the hive.

How bees produce honey from the hive. 6Kk7K
The diagram shows 7 important stages of making honey by bees. Overall, the process begins with bees creating a hive, then finishes when honey is ready to be collected and used. Firstly, the process commences when bees make hive for living and to produce honey. After, successfully building the hive bees now need to find nectar from suitable flowers and trees. Then bees fly around to search for nectar. After finding the flower bees extracts nectar from the flower and take it to the hive and place it into cells. Once this has happened hive needs air to evaporation the water and to produce air bees use their wings as fast as they can. Finally, water will evaporate and then honey can be easily extracted from the hive by only squeezing it.
The diagram
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
shows
7
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
important
stages of making honey by bees.
Overall
, the process
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
begins
with bees creating a hive, then finishes when honey is ready to
be collected
and
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
used
.

Firstly
, the process commences when bees
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
make
hive for living and to produce honey. After,
successfully
building the hive bees
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
now
need to find nectar from suitable flowers and trees. Then bees
fly
around to search for nectar. After finding the flower bees extracts nectar from the flower and take it to the hive and place it into cells.

Once this has happened hive needs air to evaporation the water and to produce air bees
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
use
their wings as
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
fast
as they can.
Finally
, water will evaporate and then honey can be
easily
extracted from the hive by
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
only
squeezing it.
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IELTS academic How bees produce honey from the hive.

Academic
  American English
3 paragraphs
132 words
This writing has been penalized,
text can't be
less than 250 words in Task 2
and less than 150 words in Task 1
5.0
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 7.0
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • ?
    Include an introduction and conclusion
  • ?
    Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • ?
    Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 6.5
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.5
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 7.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • ?
    Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
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    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
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