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hg hfhkf hhf h dk hfhf f yue u yieu u f yur

hg hfhkf hhf h dk hfhf f yue u yieu u f yur 3M3Bm
Given in the bar chart are figures related to how much money was spent on five different sectors by The United States, Canada, The United Kingdom, and Japan in 2009. Overall, the percentage of spending on accommodation and medical care in The United States was higher than in Canada, The United Kingdom, and Japan, whereas Americans had the lowest expense of total in Clothing. Canada had the highest money spent on transportation and clothing. Meanwhile, The United Kingdom spent most of its aggregate expenditure on property and Japan had the highest food share among the countries compared. The United States spent the majority of its money on housing accounting for 26%. The average expenditure of accommodation in The United Kingdom and Japan were 24% and 22%, respectively, while Canadians allocated their money in housing at 21%. Housing was the largest expenditure in all countries except Japan. Conversely, Canada had the highest transportation spending in all of the countries at20%. The United States with the second-highest expenditure at about 17%. Meanwhile, that in The United Kingdom was 15%, and Japan had the lowest, at 10%. However, in Japan, people spent 23% of their total spending on food in 2009, whereas The United Kingdom with 20%. Meanwhile, that in Canada and The United States were 15% and 14%, respectively. On health care, while 7% was the expenditure in the United States, The United Kingdom was 2%. Meanwhile Canadian and Japanese spending on this sector comprised 4% of total in both countries. Specifically, spending on clothing in all countries hovered in the vicinity of 5%.
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
Given
in the bar chart are figures related to how much
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money
was
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spent
on five
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
different
sectors by The
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United
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States
, Canada, The
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United
Kingdom, and
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Japan
in 2009.

Overall
, the percentage of
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spending
on accommodation and medical care in The
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United
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
States
was higher than in Canada, The
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United
Kingdom, and
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Japan
, whereas Americans had the lowest expense of total in Clothing. Canada had the highest
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money
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
spent
on transportation and clothing. Meanwhile, The
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United
Kingdom
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spent
most of its aggregate
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expenditure
on property and
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Japan
had the highest food share among the
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countries
compared.

The
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United
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
States
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
spent
the majority of its
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
money
on housing accounting for 26%. The average
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
expenditure
of accommodation in The
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United
Kingdom and
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
Japan
were 24% and 22%,
respectively
, while Canadians allocated their
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money
in housing at 21%. Housing was the largest
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expenditure
in all
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countries
except Japan.

Conversely
, Canada had the highest transportation
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spending
in
Consider using "all the".
all of the
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countries
at20%. The
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United
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States
with the second-highest
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expenditure
at about 17%. Meanwhile, that in The
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United
Kingdom was 15%, and
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Japan
had the lowest, at 10%.

However
, in
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Japan
,
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
people
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spent
23% of their total
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spending
on food in 2009, whereas The
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United
Kingdom with 20%. Meanwhile, that in Canada and The
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
United
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
States
were 15% and 14%,
respectively
.

On health care, while 7% was the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
expenditure
in the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
United
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
States
, The
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
United
Kingdom was 2%. Meanwhile Canadian and Japanese
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spending
on this sector comprised 4% of total in both
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countries
.
Specifically
,
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spending
on clothing in all
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countries
hovered in the vicinity of 5%.
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IELTS academic hg hfhkf hhf h dk hfhf f yue u yieu u f yur

Academic
  American English
6 paragraphs
262 words
6.0
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 5.5
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • ?
    Include an introduction and conclusion
  • ?
    Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • ?
    Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 6.0
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.5
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 6.5
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • ?
    Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
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