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Given two diagram compare the ratio of violating the law by males and females, particularly between 10 up to 60 years of ages in the UK and the gender balance in terms of captives in the British prison organization.

Given two diagram compare the ratio of violating the law by males and females, particularly between 10 up to 60 years of ages in the UK and the gender balance in terms of captives in the British prison organization. lXkM1
Given two diagram compare the ratio of violating the law by males and females, particularly between 10 up to 60 years of ages in the UK and the gender balance in terms of captives in the British prison organization. Overall, it is interesting to note that, both men and women are quite prone to commit crime during their adolescence phase. Evidenly, stooding at a mere 2% at the age of ten, males’ ratio increases drastically to 16%, before declining two folds at the age of 40. Following that, it leves out till the next five years and criminal crime conviction, however, sees substantial decrease in their old age period. As to women criminals, starting from 0% in their early childhood, the rate more than quadruples after a decade, whilst it decreases slightly by 3 %, prior to stagnate till the age of 30. The ratio of women offenders experiences steep decline when they are between 35 and 45 years old, after which the index levels out untill they are 55 with a mere 1%. At the age of 60 females are registred with no crime at all. With regard to the pie chart, 96% of male accounts for prison inmate, whilst remaining 4% comprises their counterparts.
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
Given
two diagram compare the ratio of violating the law by males and females,
particularly
between 10 up to 60 years of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
ages
in the UK and the gender balance in terms of captives in the British prison organization.

Overall
, it is interesting to note that, both
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
men
and women are quite prone to commit crime during their adolescence phase.

Possible spelling mistake found.
Evidenly
,
Possible spelling mistake found.
stooding
at a mere 2% at the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
age
of ten, males’ ratio increases
drastically
to 16%,
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
before
declining two folds at the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
age
of 40. Following that, it
Possible spelling mistake found.
leves
out till the
next
five years and criminal crime conviction,
however
,
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
sees
substantial decrease in their
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
old
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
age
period.

As to women criminals, starting from 0% in their early childhood, the rate more than quadruples after a decade, whilst it decreases
slightly
by 3 %, prior to stagnate till the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
age
of 30. The ratio of women offenders experiences steep decline when they are between 35 and 45 years
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
old
, after which the index levels out
Possible spelling mistake found.
untill
they are 55 with a mere 1%. At the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
age
of 60 females are
Possible spelling mistake found.
registred
with no crime at all.

With regard to the pie chart, 96% of male accounts for prison inmate, whilst remaining 4% comprises their counterparts.
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IELTS academic Given two diagram compare the ratio of violating the law by males and females, particularly between 10 up to 60 years of ages in the UK and the gender balance in terms of captives in the British prison organization.

Academic
  American English
5 paragraphs
206 words
5.5
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 5.5
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
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    One main idea per paragraph
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    Include an introduction and conclusion
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    Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.5
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.5
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 5.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
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    Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
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